Passing Notes
by loveangelli
Summary: I could never understand how someone so beautiful could be so full of hate. I never thought about my hatred for this man. Maybe he wasn’t the only one filled with hate. That was until we started passing notes.
1. Chapter 1

I could never understand how someone so beautiful could be so full of hate

I could never understand how someone so beautiful could be so full of hate. First year came as the exciting beginning of my new experience into the magical world. Being a Muggleborn, I couldn't help but be amazed at the things I had always been told were fantasy. The world seemed so beautiful and accepting, I never knew of the dark history that came with the beauty; the hatred that came for my kind, my muggle heritage.

I took it in stride. From the first time I was called a Mud blood to the constant teasing I had to endure from a certain beautiful Slytherin. I would never let all the things spat at me bring my self-confidence down and today was no exception.

I sat in Defense Against the Dark Arts and did as I always did, copied all the notes word for word. Snape was being an extra big git today and I felt that my house had lost so many points that we must have been in the negatives by now. Harry and Ron were not helping the situation either though.

Harry had not been able to sleep well last night and was now leaning on his hand, drool sliding down his forearm. A light snore could be heard now and then as Harry slipped from dream to dream. The only time Harry wasn't snoring was when a particular blond Slytherin would curl up a piece of parchment and chuck it at Harry's head. Harry would burst from his slumber and make a big commotion. Snape, being in the mood he is, would smirk and make a snide comment before deducting points.

Ron would enter here, saying how unfair Snape was being. Snape would make a snide comment at Ron then deduct points from Ron. Ron would turn red, huff and mumble something rude under his breath, thinking Snape wouldn't notice. Well Snape did notice and would take even MORE points away. Though I loved them like brothers, they honestly need to learn when to keep their mouths shut.

I had tried to ignore the constant commotion that seemed to be coming from my two best mates and focused on the notes we would need for our upcoming practical. I had managed to stay out of the line of fire so far but I knew it was only a matter of time.

The class had calmed down and seemed to be quiet as Snape droned on with his lecture. As he was talking about the properties of the Conjunctivitis curse when I felt something hit my head. I moved my hand to the spot that had been struck only to find a piece of parchment stuck in my hair. I was having a particularly bad hair day that day with the rain and humidity and my hair was more puffed up than it normally was. I removed the parchment from my hair, hearing the snickers of three annoying Slytherin hyenas in the back of the room.

I sighed as I opened the parchment to see what stupid thing Malfoy and his lap dogs had come up with today. Written in his neat and elegant script was the rude comment I had expected. 'Kept your precious Potter up all night did you Mud blood?' His lack of originality was astounding, as I had heard this from him on at least forty other occasions. Usually I would crumple the parchment up and continue on with my notes, but today I was not in my usual mood. Maybe it was the weather or all the activity but I was not going to let Malfoy have his words. I took my quill and wrote five simple words: 'Yes, and it was fantastic.' I crumpled the parchment up, turned in my chair and chucked it at his stupid little face.

I had turned around quickly because Malfoy had not seen it coming and I had hit him right between the eyes. I knew playing softball in my younger years would pay off some day. Snape turned around to see why Malfoy had yelled out and when Malfoy said it was nothing, Snape went back to teaching. I couldn't help but giggle at the fact that I had hit him. It was refreshing to hear Malfoy with embarrassment in his voice.

I was prepared for the parchment when it came and wasn't surprised to feel that the ball had struck with a little more force. That made me smile at Malfoy's childish attempt to get back at me. I once again removed the parchment from my hair and opened it. I rolled my eyes at the parchment. He really did need to come up with new comebacks. At least she was trying something refreshing today. She looked back down at his response. 'I never knew you were Potters whore, Mud Blood. You shagging Weasel too?'

I sighed. I picked up my quill and wrote a response I knew he wouldn't be expecting. 'Oh yes, and sometimes both of them at once.' I smiled at myself, knowing he would be surprised to see those words. I crumpled the parchment and turned to see him glaring at me. I suppressed a chuckle as I saw a tiny red mark between his eyebrows. I threw it back at him gently and gave a sweet little smile as I turned back to my notes.

Malfoy didn't respond as quickly as he had the time before. That was another small victory for me as I listened to Snape's warning about the love potion. It had been so long between his responses that I jumped slightly in my chair when I felt the presence of something in my hair. I removed the parchment that seemed to be a new piece.

I smoothed out the wrinkles of the parchment and got a bit of a shock. There on the parchment was not his usual comeback. So he had decided to add something new to his repertoire. But even MORE shocking was what was written. 'Really Granger, I thought you had higher standards than Tweedle Dee and Tweedle Dumb. I never knew you would fuck down the social ladder.'

That was something I didn't know how to respond to. Had he actually given me a hidden compliment? What did he mean about me being up the social ladder? I didn't respond, I wouldn't know how too. I just crumpled the parchment up and tried to go back to my studies. It was harder than I wanted it to be.

All day I thought about what Malfoy had said to me. I tried to figure out what he had meant, why he would say those things to me. Was he insulting me? Was he leading me into a trap to be used against me at another date? It was maddening, not knowing what he had meant by his words. I didn't like there being things I didn't know. I liked knowing the reasoning behind things, the rationale. But in this situation I just didn't know what to make of it.

At dinner that evening I watched him. I just couldn't help myself. I saw Parkinson practically shagging him on the bench. Crabbe and Goyle must have been having a contest to see who could make the biggest pigs out of themselves as they shoved food into their mouths. He seemed to be unaware of the goings on around him however. His gray eyes just looked down at his food, and he would occasionally tell Parkinson to get off of him so he could eat. That was not his normal dinner behavior. Usually he would be basking in the attention Parkinson lavished on him. He would look about the Slytherin table like the prince he was nicknamed. I just didn't get it. Why was he being so different?

When I wanted to know something I either researched things or asked questions. So since I wanted to know why Malfoy was acting so oddly, I had to ask questions. After dinner I stuck close to the Great Hall. Harry and Ron wanted to go back to the common room for a round of wizard chess and I had told them to go on without me. I needed to find out why Malfoy was acting so oddly. I knew I wouldn't be able to sleep unless I knew.

I watched as he walked out of the Great Hall. Parkinson was hanging off his arm as Crabbe and Goyle flanked him like bodyguards. Parkinson was squealing something when I saw him look at me. Our eyes connected and I felt a shiver run down my spine. Whether that shiver was fear or excitement I couldn't tell but I knew I had gotten his attention. He removed Parkinson from his arm and told them he would meet up with them in the common room. Parkinson protested to being apart from her 'Drakey' but Malfoy gave his infamous glare and she was off with a huff, the two meatheads following behind her.

He didn't come toward me; instead he inclined his head for me to follow him as he began walking. I didn't know what to do. I may be curious but I wasn't stupid. Following him could be bad, very bad. I would be alone with a suspected death eater. I could be hurt, crucioed, I could be… I stopped thinking of the could-ofs, and squared my shoulders. I wasn't afraid of him and I wouldn't let him have the pleasure of thinking such. So I followed. We walked up the stairs, down some halls, up more stairs, took turns and short cuts, all the time I was at least three feet behind him.

Finally we reached our stop, the astronomy tower. We walked into the empty classroom and I closed the door behind me, keeping my distance. We were both silent, unsure of what to say to the other. I didn't know about him but I doubted my sanity at this point. I was alone with Draco Malfoy. I didn't know what I was thinking; I didn't even know if I was thinking when I followed him. Yet here we stood, waiting for the other to speak first. Finally he broke the silence.

"Why were you watching me at dinner tonight?" It was a simple question but it still took me off guard.

I thought honesty was the best policy. "I was trying to figure out why you said those things to me today in potions."

He scoffed; as if that was the dumbest answer he had ever heard. Hell to him it could have been. Hell to ME it didn't seem like a good reason but it was the honest reason. We were both silent again. He kept his eyes down to the floor, not looking at me. His face was unreadable. He didn't have his signature smirk or scowl. He didn't even look mad or upset. He looked… pensive. He looked as if he were trying to think of something to say. After some time I couldn't take the silence and I asked the one question I had been dying to ask him.

"Why did you say those things to me?"

His signature scowl made an appearance as he scoffed again. "Because that's what you are, a Mud Blood."

I sighed as I shook my head. I took out the parchment he had thrown at me in potions. I had been keeping it in my pocket and re-reading it over and over again, trying to figure out the meaning behind his words. "No, This." I took a few edgy steps toward him and handed him the note.

He took it without looking at me. His stormy eyes scanned the words he had written. He sat there. Not saying anything but reading and re-reading his words. It was unnerving having him be so silent. I didn't move. I just watched him. I could feel myself starting to tense as my mind began to think of all the things he could do next. Was he going to curse me? Was he going to yell at me and hit me? Was he going to…

"It's because it's true." His voice pulled me out of my what ifs as I barely heard what he said.

"What?" I didn't know if it was because he had basically whispered those words or the sheer shock of it all, but I couldn't understand what he meant by that.

He stood and walked over to me, handing me the paper again. "I said it's because it's true." He towered over me. I had never noticed how much taller he was than me until he stood before me. In fact he had never stood so close to me before. Usually he kept his distance; I always assumed it was because he didn't want to get my 'Mud Blood' germs on him. But here he stood; so close I could smell his musky cologne. I could see his chest rise and fall as his school shirt pulled tight against it.

My mind was starting to fog as he stood so close to me. I never had the chance to allow myself to just admire his beauty. Many of the girls spoke of his beauty but I had always scoffed and put it aside as it being Malfoy, and Malfoy equaled disgusting. Being close to him there was no way to deny his natural beauty.

He had pale skin that seemed to glow in the dim light coming in through the windows. His skin looked smooth and soft. His hands were quite large and covered with calluses from quidditch. His body also seemed sculpted by the sport he played. His arms looked strong and thick with the muscles he had to keep himself on the broom. I could tell his stomach was tight and fit. I moved up to his lips, which were small and pink. He must have licked his lips recently for they seemed to glisten in the pale moonlight. His face was well sculpted with high cheekbones and a strong jaw line. Then there were his eyes. I had once feared those eyes being on me. Every time I saw them they were harsh and cold. The stormy gray adding to the chill you felt when they pierced through you. Yet now they were not as harsh and cold as I remembered. They seemed soft and I thought I saw a hint of confusion.

How had I never noticed how amazing his beauty was? Was it my hatred from him that had clouded me all these years? I never thought about my hatred for this man, I had always focused on the hatred he directed at me. Maybe he wasn't the only one filled with hate. Maybe I had equal, if more hatred for him. We both took blows at each other, both glared when the other caught our eye. We responded the same way around each other, we always reacted with hate. This thought made me wonder, when had I become the person I hated? When had Malfoy and I become the same?

He shifted his weight, an edge of discomfort creeping into his body language. I blushed as I noticed I must have been starring. I looked away from him, trying to cool my flaming cheeks. I remembered what he had said; 'I said it's because it's true.' I didn't understand the meaning behind that phrase and reverted back to my inquiring state.

"What do you mean by that? 'Because it's true'?" I whispered, a little embarrassed by how weak my voice sounded. He was getting to me and not in the way I was used to. I was prepared to handle his biting remarks, his name-calling, and his fierce cold stare. I just wasn't prepared for the soft looks, the warm glances he sent toward me and the tenderness of his voice.

He scoffed; he seemed to be doing that often tonight. "Look Granger," He ran a hand through his messy blond hair. He seemed to be uncomfortable with what he was about to say. "You..." He stopped as he reconsidered his words. "Look you're..." he stopped again. I could see him getting more frustrated with himself as the harshness started to leak into his gaze. "You're better than them, ok? You are so much smarter than those blundering idiots you associate with. You are going to do great things, become incredibly successful and all on your merits alone. You don't have anyone's name to fall back on and you don't need it. Pot head has his stupid legacy and Weasel isn't going anywhere but back to his hole while you will go out and take over the world."

I was blown away. I hadn't expected that. I hadn't even THOUGHT he would be capable of paying me such high compliments. I was stuck; I didn't know how to respond to such wonderful words coming from someone I thought was so horrible. I just stood there, eyes wide and mouth open. I didn't know what was going on until I felt his soft lips against mine.

I looked at him as if he had four heads. He was leaning down, his hands gently placed on my shoulders and he had kissed me. His lips didn't move against mine, just pressed lightly. I could feel the softness of his lips, the warmth of his breath and that amazing scent floating up into my nose.

The kiss was over as fast as it had come. He leaned back and had opened his eyes, staring right into mine. I must have looked like a tomato because my face was so warm. I couldn't think, I couldn't move, I couldn't even breathe. All I could do was look back up into his eyes, wondering if that had actually happened. Wondering if this was reality, or if I had followed Ron and Harry back to the common room and had fallen asleep there.

Malfoy looked away, his eyes and face unreadable. He walked back over to his cloak, picked it up and headed for the door.

I heart was racing as I watched him walk toward the door. I didn't want him to go just yet. I had a million more questions to ask him and I just couldn't let him leave without having some answers. I reached out and grabbed his arm. I whispered his name as if I spoke it any louder the moment would slip away, "Draco."

He stopped walking as I held his arm. He didn't turn around, he didn't try and take his arm back, he just stood there. I didn't know what to say; I hadn't thought that far ahead. I just knew I wanted him to stay. I walked around to face him, to see if I could uncover his thoughts through his eyes. I moved close to his front and just looked at his face.

His face held the cool demeanor he always wore around others but his eyes were no longer guarded. I could see my confusion mirrored in his eyes. The wonder of what had happened and what would happen flickered through those stone eyes. I didn't know what came over me but my confusion drained away as I lifted up on the balls of my feet and pushed my lips to his.

It was just as simple as the kiss he had given me but this time my body was much closer to his. I pulled my arms close to my chest and just enjoyed the feel of his lips pressed against mine. I then felt his lips move against mine as his arms found their way around my waist. He began to move his lips more against mine. I had kissed boys before, but this kiss was somehow different. It seemed scary, wonderful, and dangerously forbidden all at once.

I waited a moment; simply enjoying the soft kiss he gave me before moving my arms away from my chest and around his neck. I wanted to feel how soft his hair was, how amazing his chest would feel against mine, how it would feel if I forgot my hatred and enjoyed the beautiful boy in front of me.

My hands moved up into his hair and it was like touching silk. The soft golden locks fell through my fingers as I pushed myself closer to him. Everything felt new and wonderful. I seemed to fit right into him as his chest pushed against mine. All I could think of was how I didn't want to stop kissing him; I never wanted to stop kissing him.

His arms wrapped tighter around my waist as one hand ran up my back and into my hair. He pushed my head closer to his as we deepened our kiss. His tongue was now moving against mine and it was like nothing I had ever experienced. He was skilled beyond anyone I had ever been with and he surpassed me by leaps and bounds. I had kissed before but I had never kissed with the skill he possessed. I felt embarrassed that he might not enjoy my kissing. I stopped then, pulling away just an inch so our lips were no longer touching.

I looked up and saw him looking at me. So many questions were in his eyes, so many thoughts. I shivered at the intensity in his eyes. He began to pull back a bit more but I held firm, I didn't want him to. I wanted him to stay close to me, keep his body close against mine. When he felt my resistance he stopped and continued to stare at me. We both just stared, unsure of what to do. Our minds and bodies were fighting, arguing weather we should stay or go. Weather we should continue with our intimate encounter or part ways and forget it ever happened.

He made the first move in kissing me again. This kiss was different; this kiss was more than simple. It was more passionate, more intimate, and more intense. He picked me up and I instinctively wrapped my legs around his waist. He started to walk with me, his arms holding me tightly so I wouldn't fall. Soon he set me on a desk as he leaned over me, pushing me down against the table.

His hands started to roam then, moving up and down my sides, moving my shirt away from my body. I could feel the cool fall air tickling my sides as his hands gingerly touched my skin. I shivered at the tickling sensation of his touch. I followed his lead and moved my hands from his shoulders to his chest. I could feel the tension in his muscles as I ran my hands over them. I didn't know if the tension was from the situation or holding himself up but I ignored it, continuing my exploration.

I was deathly curious at this point. I had heard of the wonder that was his body, Lavender singing his praises as often as she could. I wanted to see it for myself. See if what Lavender said was true. See if his body was the splendor that her tales depicted. I moved my hands under his shirt and moved up his abs. I heard myself moan, unaware that I was the one making it at the time. His skin was just as smooth as it looked as the softness of his skin contrasted with the harshness of his muscles. I had never felt anything like this. His muscles were toned and long helping him to keep his slim appearance.

He was better than the tales I had heard. Lavender did not do his body the justice it deserved. When artists and poets wrote of tales of beautifully perfect men they meant Draco. I moved my hands over his back to feel the same contrast as his chest. He had moved from kissing my mouth to kissing my neck. He would kiss my skin, nipping and licking at certain spots.

I felt a pooling of moisture between my thighs as he moved one of his legs between mine, parting them. His hands moved from my sides up toward my breasts. I stiffened instinctually. Though the man was intoxicating and deliciously arousing I didn't know if I was prepared to give myself to him. I didn't know if I could trust him with my most precious gift. I had never gone past an intense song feast and I didn't know if I wanted Draco to be the first.

He stopped as he felt me stiffen and pulled away from kissing my neck. He moved to look at me again and saw the doubt on my face. I didn't know what he was thinking, feeling. I needed to know, I needed to understand his motives in kissing me, touching me. But I didn't think he would be willing to give them to me. I didn't think he would be willing to trust in me just like I wasn't ready to trust in him.

He pulled back again and this time I didn't stop him. My doubts and distrust had been too great to continue to push aside. I fixed my shirt and skirt, making sure they were in the proper place. Draco also fussed with his clothes as he moved his pants trying to gain some sort of relief from the obvious tenting.

I looked away blushing. I didn't know how to feel about what we had just done, and I didn't know what he would say about it. I felt his cloak on my shoulders and looked up at him.

"Let me take you back to your common room." He didn't look at me while he said this but rather looked at the door. I nodded looking down at the floor as I jumped off the desk. I felt so embarrassed. He must think I'm some slut like I pretended to be in the note. He had said such wonderful things about me but what if they were just words to get me to loosen up and forget his injustices against me.

We walked in silence, Draco walking in step with me. We didn't look at each other or touch each other, we just walked. Soon we reached my common room door and I had, again, more questions I wanted answered. Yet this time I didn't have the courage to ask the questions. I woke the fat lady and told her the password; it must be later than I thought. Definitely passed curfew. The portrait swung open and I turned to tell Draco thank you when his lips were on mine again. It was another sweet kiss, simple, just his lips pressed against mine. He pulled back and cupped my face with his hand.

"Good night Granger," he said softly.

"Good night Draco," I responded as I turned and walked through the portrait, his cloak billowing behind me.

Author Note: I hoped you liked my little story. I may continue this if I get a good response from you guys. Please let me know if you think I should continue or just leave this as a One-shot. Again thank you for reading and I hoped you liked it.


	2. Chapter 2

I'd lost it

I never knew how the one I hated would become the one who changed me. I was born into a life of privilege. From the day I was born I was told what to do, how to act and with whom I would associate. My life had been planned since the moment it began leaving me little room to become my own being.

I never rejected the life I was given in fact I embraced it. I was royalty above all others because of my name and pedigree. I loved it. I then embarked on my magical education only to find I was not the one who needs to be educated. So many people not knowing their place and whom they had the gale to speak to. I had to spread my education to those in the most need of it, and it brought me to her.

She was nothing more than a filthy Mudblood. I had never seen her kind before and had expected something grotesque and putrid according to my father's teachings. But she was nothing of the sort. She was elegant, well spoken, and kind hearted, and everything I had not expected a Mud Blood to be. I believe that was the first true day of my education. I ignored her obvious abilities as a witch and disregarded that she had surpassed me in marks. I refused to acknowledge that someone of lesser birth could be better than me, but soon I had to succumb for my grades were always second best to hers.

That's why I hated her; because she was where I was supposed to be, on top. I had the breeding, the looks and the life long understanding of magic where as she had only known it a few short years. I hated her, but only out of jealousy. I would never have imagined that my supposed hate could morph into my change.

It had been another boring day of Defense Against the Dark Arts with the stupid gryffindorks. The rain was hitting the windowpane adding an undertone to Snapes droning. He was talking about some curse that I already knew everything about, the disadvantages of being so brilliant, I was so incredibly bored that I thought I was going to fall over and die in that instant. Crabbe and Goyle were having their daily 'who is the dumbest' contest as they tried their hardest to follow along with Snape. I had given up on paying attention and was scanning the room for something to help relieve my boredom.

Pansy was flapping her clumpy eyelashes at me, thinking she looked marginally attractive. Her pug little nose seemed to be turned up even more today as her harshly red lips made the kiss shape. I swore I wanted to vomit all over my new Italian cloak. She really did need to get the hint that we were never going to be together, no matter what our fathers said. If I had to spend my life kissing that pug then I'd rather be killed by the Dark Lord now.

The Brown girl was also sending flirtatious glances my way. At least she was more agreeable to look at than that dog in my house. Maybe I would have to send her an owl and plan a little after hours get together. I was imagining the Brown girl and I shagging on McGonagall's desk when Crabbe grunted something at me. Merlin, he wanted my attention.

I glanced over at him giving him my 'you-better-not-be-wasting-my-time' look when he shoved his huge fat finger toward the front of the room. I thought he was trying to ask me a question about what Snape had been saying when I saw it. Pothead was leaning on his hand, in a deep sleep, drooling all over the place. Finally, something that would make the time fly. I stole Crabbe's notes, it's not like he would use them anyway, crumbled it up and chuckled it right at Potter's stupid scarred head.

I almost died from laughter. Potter practically jumped out of his seat, screaming something about chocolate frogs and flinging his drool all over his books. I would have to place that memory in a pensive so I could always remember it. It was the funniest thing I had seen pothead do in a while. Snape, of course, took points away for disrupting class, which got weasel all, fired up. Weasel was spouting about how that wasn't fair that his little boyfriend got points snatched away only to get MORE points taken for disrupting the class again. The day couldn't have been going better if I had planned it.

The class started to settle again and Potter had refused to let himself fall back to sleep. My boredom started to set in again. I sighed. Pansy was still gawking at me, the Brown girl had moved from shy glances to blowing kisses and I was still not amused. I looked around the room, thinking of what could help in continuing my fun. That's when I spotted bushy hair.

She had her head crouched down over a long piece of parchment scribbling every word Snape wrote on the board. She was always like that, hunch back and bushy. I had spent some time observing her. Not that it was because I liked it, oh no, it was because…. It was because…. It was because she was the brains of the operation and by knowing what she's doing you know what the dunderheads are doing. Yes, that's why I watched her. I thought it would be fun getting a few words in against her. She was always a little spitfire when it came to our verbal spats. She could match my wit blow for blow.. Not that she was my match at any other place. No she wasn't even my match in wit, let me take that back. She was just fun to bother. There.

So I wrote down some words that I know would get a rise out of her, or at least start her down the path of blowing up. I took out some of my parchment and wrote down the phrase 'Kept your precious potter up all night did you Mudblood?' I showed it Crabbe and Goyle who snickered. I then balled it up and threw it at her. It hit her right in the head and got caught in her frizzy hair. I couldn't help but chuckle at the way it just stuck there in that tangled mess of weeds she called hair.

She reached behind her and removed the parchment from her hair. I waited, wanting to see her turn around with her face aflame from anger. I waited, and waited, and she didn't turn around. Damn, she was in her 'Ignore me' mood. There goes my fun. I looked down at my parchment, trying to ignore the not so subtle looks Pansy AND the brown girl was now flinging at me.

Women like that just weren't as exciting. I knew I was handsome, everyone knew that, but they didn't need to throw themselves at me. I missed the hunt, the chase, and for ONCE could I have a girl who HADN'T slept with half of Hogwarts. I sighed again as I started to make a list of girls who I hadn't heard much sex stories about. Millicent was at the top of my list, followed by a few six years who I suspected to be lesbians, then came the most obvious of all, pure little Granger.

Besides me, no one was honestly saying anything about her being promiscuous. I am sure the frizzy head was a turn off for men but she wasn't all bad. She had fairly pretty brown eyes. If her hair ever calmed down I bet it would be nice too. I don't really know how her body is though, seeing as she wears…

That's when I felt something hit me right between the eyes. I screamed out in surprise and a bit of pain. That thing hit me so hard I KNEW it would leave a mark. That infuriated me. Whoever threw that had it coming to them.

"Can I help you mister Malfoy?" Snape questioned me as I could feel my cheeks heat up a bit. Everyone was looking at me now and I must have had a bit welt on my head from whatever hit me.

"No sir." I replied, trying to maintain my pride. How embarrassing. I looked over at Crabbe and Goyle who were still snickering. The second I glared at them they shut up and pretended to understand the words coming out of Snapes mouth. I looked down to see what hit me. It was the parchment I threw at Granger. So she was the one who had slammed it into his face.

I opened the parchment to see what the bint had to say, only to be a bit shocked. There, in her stupid girlish writing was 'yes, and it was fantastic.' Now THAT was not what I was expecting. I was expecting a 'shut up ferret' or maybe a 'grow up Malfoy.' But to see those words written by little miss innocent did something to me. I couldn't explain what I felt at that but I knew what I was going to say in response.

I picked up my quill and with a self-satisfied smirk I wrote my reply 'I never knew you were Potters whore, Mudblood. You shagging Weasel too?' That would get the response I wanted. There was no way she would be able not to get mad at that. She would get mad and tell me off in her little way then I would win.

I threw the parchment ball back at her bushy head, laughing when it got stuck once again. I don't think I would ever not find that funny. She once again reached up for the parchment and I was once again left to wait for her anger. I watched her this time, not wanting to be hit in the face again.

She seemed to sigh before picking up her quill again. This was it; here came her tidal wave of anger. She turned around in her seat and I set my glare on her. I was very disappointed when she turned, gently threw me the parchment ball and smiled. Not just any smile but a smile so sweet you could feel the sugar in it. That made me very curious as to what she was so proud to tell me. I un-crumpled the parchment and looked down at her words. Again I was blown away.

This time I had no idea what to say. I re-read the words she wrote. 'Oh yes, and sometimes both of them at once.' That upset me. I didn't know why it upset me but it did. How could she even think to do anything with those two? They didn't deserve her. She was so smart, hell she was smarter than he was. She had a few little qualms about herself but they had become somewhat endearing over the years. Sure I made fun of her rats nest she called her hair but I couldn't imagine her without it. It was her signature. You could point her out of a crowd just by her hair and it made her different.

She also was great because she wanted to be. I knew if I didn't have my father looming over my shoulder to get good grades I wouldn't work as hard. I would slack off of my duties and just enjoy my time at Hogwarts. She was great because of something deep inside of her. I hated to admit it but I had to respect her for that. She was going to do great things. She could even be the next minister of magic with her brains and skill. Before I knew it I had ripped the parchment to pieces. I didn't know why I was so enraged by her words.

I dusted the torn pieces off my clothing and pulled a new one out. I wrote what was repeating over and over in my mind again. 'Really Granger, I thought you had higher standards then twiddle dee and twiddle dumb. I never knew you would fuck down the social ladder.' I balled the parchment up tightly and threw it at her with a bit more force than I intended. I was just so upset and the fact that I was upset was upsetting me more.

I was glad when potions was over and I had a chance to get away from everything. Potions was my last class of the day so I ignored Pansy and Brown and went straight for the pitch. Whenever I had things to think over I found flying to help. When I flew it was like being free from everything. I could forget my father, the Dark Lord, and hopefully, even Granger.

I ran right into the Slytherin changing room and pulled on my quidditch uniform. I was in a rush, just wanting to get out there and start forgetting. I grabbed my broom from my cubby and ran out into the field.

The pitch was like heaven to me. If you listened hard enough you could still hear the chanting from the quidditch games. I could see everyone filling the stands, waiting for the game to start. I smirked as I walked to the center of the field. I could hear my house chanting for us, hoping for a victory. The other houses would boo and curse but I never cared, it just drove me to prove to them that I could lead my team to victory. We would get on our brooms and hover over the well-manicured grass.

I looked around; it was as if I wasn't alone. I could clearly see the stands full; hear the deafening roar of the crowd. It was a rush, knowing all eyes were on you. This was what I lived for I lived for the rush. Every time I got on my broom I could feel the energy of the crowds soak into my skin. My heart would start to pound in my chest. My heartbeat would mix with the cheers and roars of the crowd and my mind would drift into euphoria.

The game was on. I zoomed around the pitch, watching the game mostly but still keeping an eye out for that tiny flicker of gold that would alert me to the snitch. I could see my teammates as they whizzed back and forth, tossing the quaffle between them. The other team just couldn't keep up with us. We worked as one. I worked my team hard so that no matter what anyone said about us they couldn't say that we didn't have skill.

I would continue to fly around the pitch, not only watching the game but also watching my main opponent. His actions could alert me to the snitch. He was sneaky. I had to be careful. He may dive just to get me to dive then shoot up and catch the snitch. It had happened before and I would never let it happen again.

I eyed him; cautious of every movement he made when suddenly he headed for the ground. But he hadn't planned on me catching sight of the snitch. I smiled as I shot up, gaining a lead on him. There was no way he would be able to catch me. I was one with my broom, crouching low so that there would be less air resistance. I reached out my arm, holding tightly to the broom with the other.

This was always the best part of the game, when I was in a dead heat to catch the elusive gold ball. Seconds turn to minutes as I kept reaching for it. When you are just about to catch the snitch it's as if your world becomes highly sensitive. You can feel the wind ripping at your flesh; the harsh brittles of the broom butchered your skin. My eyesight would become enhanced and the second I felt the smooth metal I would clamp down.

Time would resume back to normal as the roar of the crowd assaulted you. You could fell the snitch wiggling, not willing to be captured. But you had done it, you had beaten everyone who thought you couldn't do it, you had caught the snitch.

I looked around at the empty pitch and opened my hand to find air. I smiled, satisfied that I once again felt calm. I lowered my broom down to the grass and jumped off. I closed my eyes one more time and could once again hear the crowd chant. I smiled and walked back to the changing rooms. I knew dinner was soon so I took a quick shower.

Dinner was maddening. Pansy had found me and had refused to let me leave her side. She sat next to me and ate her food in what she must have thought as a 'sexy' manner. I don't see how anyone could eat chicken sexily. Usually I sit at the table and look around, admiring my kingdom. I always felt like a prince when I was with my house. Everyone respected me and I was head dog. But today, I just didn't feel that way.

I had looked at her. I could feel hear eyes on me at one point during dinner and I had looked up to meet her eyes. I never knew how beautiful they were until then. Even from across the Great Hall I could feel the warmth and love that accompanied her gaze. She looked at everyone like that, everyone but me.

I didn't deserve that gaze but how I longed to have it. In a world filled with darkness it was nice to feel the rays of sun on your face. I don't know if she knew she was giving me this look but I hoped she wouldn't stop. I thought back to earlier in potions and how I had felt at her comment. I still didn't understand why I was so upset by it. I couldn't grasp what had caused my suffering at hearing her say she was with those two. Even if she was joking, just trying to get a rise out of me, I still didn't like it.

I looked down at the table. I didn't want to see her eyes anymore. They just cause me more confusion than I wanted. I knew how my life would run. I knew what my father had planned for me. I would marry, serve a mad man and die young. I had no hopeful ideals about my future; I wouldn't let myself have them. No matter how much I wanted to graduate from Hogwarts and become a professional quidditch player I knew it wouldn't come true. I was trapped by the Malfoy name, forever forced to do this that would keep me stuck in this life.

I stood up from the table and glanced over at the Gryffindor. She wasn't there. I felt foolish for looking. What was I hoping to find by looking? I shook my head as I felt Pansy leech onto me. Crabbe and Goyle stood on either side of me as I headed for the door.

As soon as I walked out of the Great Hall I felt her heated stare. I instantly turned my head and there she was, hiding in the dark, staring at me. She seemed to want to speak to me. I didn't know how I knew that but I just did. Maybe it was my want to speak to her that drove me to think that but I knew I had to go to her.

I turned to my personal leech and shrugged her off. "Go back to the common room, I'll meet you there."

Her pug face squished together as her shrill voice assaulted my ears. "But Drakey where are you going? Can't I come with you?"

I glared at her, knowing she would become frightened and obey me. It worked, she had stomped her foot and began to walk away, Crabbe and Goyle following behind her. I waited until they were out of sight before I nodded my head toward her and started walking.

I could feel my nerves starting to build up. What would I say to her? I had never truly spoken to the Gryffindor princess. I had insulted her, yelled at her and called her horrible names, but I had never honestly SPOKEN to her.

God how stupid was I being. She is a Mud Blood. Everything that I am not supposed to like. She is not someone you should want to talk to. You should not be thinking about her. She is dirty, she is beneath me, and she is everything I could ever want in a woman.

I shook my head, hating my thoughts for being against me. No. I would never want a Mud Blood. I would never taint my bloodline.

We reached the astronomy tower and I entered the empty classroom. I could feel her behind me; she never came close to me. She probably feared me. Good. That's how it should stay. Least she forgets her place. I tried to get mad, I tried to build up my walls so that I could face her and find out what she wanted from me.

She didn't speak though. I stood there waiting for her to speak but she never did. It was maddening, the silence between us. My mind was a buzz. I couldn't help thinking why I had come here. What I had been thinking. I then had to break the silence, so I asked her one of the questions that I had on my mind. "Why were you watching me at dinner tonight?"

I didn't look at her I couldn't look at her. Just being in the same room as her was causing me to feel things I couldn't explain. She forced me to question myself, question why I had allowed myself to be in her presence, question if the life I had was what I really wanted.

"I was trying to figure out why you said those things to me today in potions."

I scuffed, didn't she know WHY he called her a Mud Blood. I had said it to her so many times it was common now. Mud Blood. That word brought a whole new bash of thoughts. What did it mean to be a Mud Blood? Was she really so much different from me? We both had eyes, hair, fingers, and toes. Was her blood really different from mine? If I cut her, hit her, forced her to bleed, would she have the same colored blood?

"Why did you say those things to me?" her soft voice cut through my thoughts.

I was caught off guard and thus revered back to my typical behavior. I scowled at her and scuffed at her words, trying to make them seem worthless. "Because that's what you are, a Mud Blood."

My voice didn't hold as much conviction as I wanted it to. I heard her sigh as she shook her head. She took out a piece of parchment from her pocket. I didn't know what it was but I was sure she would tell me, being the know-it-all she was.

"No, This." She took a few steps toward me, each step was tense as if she was afraid I would reach out and hurt her. She handed me the parchment and I took it without looking up at her.

I looked over my words. 'Really Granger, I thought you had higher standards then twiddle dee and twiddle dumb. I never knew you would fuck down the social ladder.' I read them once, twice, at the third time I knew she was expecting answer, I just didn't know what to say. How could I tell her what I was feeling at that point, what I thought of her without seeming completely out of character?

"It's because it's true." I said simply, still not looking up at her.

She seemed to have been deep in thought as well. Her voice squeaked as she asked. "What?"

I took a step toward her and handed her back the paper. "I said it's because it's true." She was so small compared to me. The top of her head barely reached my shoulders. She wasn't looking up at me but rather at my chest. I could feel her warmth as her eyes roamed over my body. I took that moment to actually see her. Before she had always been the Mud Blood know it all but now, in this room, in this light, she was a woman.

She wasn't wearing a cloak so her arms had tiny goose pimples all over them. She had a few top buttons un-done on her blouse so I could see down her shirt. Merlin, who knew she had the loveliest breasts I had ever seen. She had milky white skin that glowed in the moonlight. I could see the outline of her simple white bra as it cupped her. She wasn't too large but she still had at least a handful.

I watched her watch me. She was looking at my arms, her gaze searing my skin. I licked my lips as her eyes started to travel up to my face. When she looked up at me I was finally able to take in her beauty. She was wonderful. She had a soft, round face with perfect skin. Her cheeks were flushed red as she looked intently at my face. Then she looked up into my eyes and I melted.

Her eyes were her best feature. They were deep chocolate pools that were smooth and looked like rich silk. How could I have missed her? How could I have not seen the unique beauty she possessed? Had I really been blinded by my prejudice, my misguided hatred? How could an emotion keep me from seeing her? I shifted my weight, unsure of what to do.

She looked away, her face turning bright red. I'm sure she was just as confused as I was.

"What do you mean by that? 'Because it's true'?" she whispered, her voice sounding small and weak.

I scuffed again, more as a way to delay so I could think of how to respond. Now I had to think of an answer. "Look Granger," I started as I pushed my hand through my hair. I had to tell her something but I didn't know what to say. Somewhere, in the back of my mind, a voice was telling me to tell her the truth. "You.." I stopped as that little voice came close to speaking. I turned to my defenses and started to think of Mud Blood comments. "Look you're.." a Mud Blood, come on say it. But I couldn't I just could call her that while she stood so close to me, smelling so good. My weakness gave that little voice enough time to win. "You're better than them, ok. You are so much smarter than those blundering idiots you associate with. You are going to do great things, become incredibly successful and all on your merits alone. You don't have anyone's name to fall back on and you don't need it. Pot head has his stupid legacy and Weasel isn't going anywhere but back to his hole while you will go out and take over the world."

Merlin, what had I done? My mind was moving a mile a minute. It felt like I was about to catch the snitch. Everything became intense and before I knew it I was leaning down to kiss her.

Her lips were just as smooth as the snitch. I could feel the warmth of her eyes as she looked at me, but I kept mine closed. If she was glaring at me I just didn't want to know, and if she wasn't, I don't think I would be able to handle it. I stood there, simply pressing my lips to hers. Part of my mind screaming my fathers words at me for telling me how wrong this was and another part finally feeling content. I felt more at peace with my lips against hers than I could have riding my broom for a hundred years.

I pulled back and opened my eyes to see her reaction. She seemed like a frightened jackrabbit that was waiting for the wolf to eat her. She didn't seem happy not as content as I felt. I felt embarrassed by my actions. How fucking thoughtless I was to let my guards down like that. I should have known better, I don't know what I was thinking.

I looked away from her, the anger I felt toward myself building by leaps and bounds. I shouldn't have come here, I should have just glared at her and forgotten the note had ever happened. Maybe then I wouldn't be so weak; maybe then I wouldn't be feeling all these emotions. I walked to get my cloak, ready to head back to the common room and back to my old life where it was much simpler. I was just at the door when she grabbed my arm.

I had to stop myself from turning around and yelling at her. I was so angry with myself but more so I was lost. What was I doing, thinking, and feeling. Life had been so black and white before she came and made shades of gray. This stupid little Mud Blood had gotten under my skin and no matter what I did she was going to stay there.

She walked in front of me and looked into my eyes. I tried to keep my shields up, block her out so she couldn't do more harm. I needed to go, I needed to get back to a place where everything made sense again. But she wouldn't let me as she moved toward my face and I felt her lips touch mine.

I was a broken man. I moved my arms to encompass her waist and brought her closer to me. She had won, beaten me down and made me want her. No matter how dirty her blood may be I didn't care, I simply enjoyed the way she fit into my arms, the way her hair smelled of lilac. I felt her hands run through my hair and I all but broke. I wanted to put her up, throw her against the wall and demand answers as to how she had come to posses my mind. I wrapped my arms tighter around her, trying to control myself. I moved one hand up to her hair and forced her head closer to mine.

This was madness. I was mad with insanity. Who would have thought I would be kissing the most notorious Mud Blood at Hogwarts. I couldn't understand how this was happening. I shouldn't be doing this, I should be pushing her away, screaming at her for tainting me, not wanting to pick her up and plant myself deep inside of her.

I pulled back, my erection becoming a major problem. I had to stop. I couldn't do this. I had to go to a bathroom, wank off and forget thing ever happened. I noticed she had pulled away as well. I couldn't take the heat of her eyes as she looked up at me. She was too pure, to innocent. I couldn't ruin her; bring her down to the horrid level I dwelled upon. I tried to pull back more, get away from her and everything that was happening but she wouldn't let me go.

I just looked at her, willing her to understand my desperation. I needed to stop this, gain control again. I couldn't be ruining everything I had built up. In this one moment I had destroyed the man I was and I was left wondering who I was going to become. She just stared at me, her eyes pleading with me to stay, begging me to bring her to my world. I could hold back any longer. I had already brought shame to my family name; I might as well enjoy it.

I moved my head closer to hers and took her lips. I couldn't be gentle anymore. I had to have her. She had ruined me, taken everything from me and I wanted nothing more than to have her. I lifted her up and felt her slim legs wrap around me. My erection was pulsing as I felt the heat coming from her core. I had to know what she felt like; I had to see what I had given everything up for.

I laid her against a table as I began to pull her shirt up, her soft skin burning my fingers. She was a goddess. She had to be. No other woman had ever made me so hungry with need before. No women had ever ensnared my mind with such desperate want. I could feel her touching my chest and back. I moved from kissing her mouth to lavishing her neck with nips and licks. Her eyes may have been chocolate but she tasted of vanilla. Her hands were so small, so delicate. I feared I would break her but was to far gone to care. I moved from her sides up toward those amazing breasts when I felt her stiffen.

No not now, please, please don't do this to me. I moved my head to look her in the eye and saw her doubt. I could ignore her, continue on and take what I needed but the look on her face held me still. I couldn't do it. Her spell on me was too strong and I pulled back.

I was dazed, not sure of all that had just happened. I fixed my clothing and tried to gain some relief for my pounding erection. I knew I would have to take care of that later.

"Let me take you back to your common room." I said feeling defeated as I placed my cloak over her. I couldn't look at her, for I knew I would push her against the nearest wall and ignore her pleas to stop. We walked in silence as I tried to figure everything out. I had gone through so many emotions in the span of a few hours to leave me emotionally drained for weeks. I followed her as she led me to her portrait were she had to wake the woman up to get in. She turned toward me and I lost my control for a moment longer.

I pressed my lips against hers, keeping it simple yet satisfying my need. I pulled back and cupped her face in my hand. She had forever changed me with a simple kiss and she didn't even know it.

"Good Night Granger." I all but whispered.

"Good Night Draco." She said as she rushed into her portrait.

And here I was, completely mad. I had lost it. I had lost every sense of who I was and every sense of what she was. In the moments we had been together I had shattered any hope of living my fathers life for I could never see the dirty mongrel I once saw in her.

I walked the halls, just thinking. I finally reached my common room and walked in to find a very miffed Pansy. She had obviously been waiting for me.

Her shrill voice broke through my thoughts as she stood from the couch and rushed to me. "Where have you been!? And where is your new cloak!?"

I simply pushed her aside and told her good night. I wasn't in the mood. At the mention of my missing coat I had thought of her small frame hidden under it. I would have to get it back some how and by doing that I would have to be alone with her again. I wondered what our next meeting would bring.

Author Note: I would first like to say thank you to everyone who reviewed, you guys were the reason I decided to write and post this. I would also like to thank everyone who added my humble story to your favorite/ alert lists. That made me very happy to see!! And last, but most definitely not least, I would like to say how much I love my new Beta Stephanie Also Known As DracolikesototallyROCKS. I love you and I praise your wonderfulness!! You all are wonderful and I hope you will review and let me know what you thought of this second installment.


	3. Chapter 3

I remember the first time he insulted me. We were in our second year, Ron and I had nothing to do and since Harry had been woken up early for Quidditch practice, we decided to watch him. The day was going by smoothly and everything was lovely until the Slytherins showed up. Insults were thrown back and forth between the teams and yet I was barely focusing on what was going on.

I was young and when we are young we do stupid things, like find the horrid blond boy appealing in his Quidditch robes. I would never admit it, but that day my heart caught in my throat. He was every bit as beautiful as the day I first saw him. I always thought of him as an angel, a fallen one, but an angel non-the less. His blond hair glowed in the light as it was always pushed back from his face. His green Quidditch robes showed off his build and were obviously made to fit his lithe body. He looked strong, quick, and incredibly breathtaking. I was so wrapped up in him that I was only able to catch the last line of the argument.

He was leaning against his expensive broom looking calm and collected. "…You could raffle off those Cleansweep Fives; I expect a museum would bid for them." The rest of Malfoy's teammates laughed as I could feel every Weasley there glower with anger. Though I may have been infatuated with him seconds before, his snip at my friends brought me to the forefront of the argument.

"At least no one on the Gryffindor team had to buy their way in," I said sharply. "They got in on pure talent."

Malfoy looked straight at me then. Before he had also looked through me, never honestly at me, so to feel the intensity of his glare was staggering. I stood there, holding a breath as I waited to take the first of many verbal beatings to come.

It took him a moment to regain his calm exterior and when he did his eyes seemed to glisten with joy. Whatever he was going to say, he thought was going to be the winning statement. He parted his lips and all but growled at me, "No one asked your opinion, you filthy little Mudblood."

I learned later what a Mudblood was and from then on it was Malfoy's pet name for me. I never went a day without hearing the foul word slip from his tongue and soon the word lost its edge. I became accustomed to hearing it every day, so when days slipped by without it, I was thrown through a loop.

It had been a week since our night in the astronomy tower and I hadn't heard from him. We still saw each other in our classes, the halls, the great hall, but not once had we spoken. It was maddening, having so many questions and no answers. That night I had sought him out, followed him up there for answers, not more questions. I found myself drifting from reality just to think about it. Try and pick apart each action, each word, find something to soothe my rattled brain. Yet every time I replayed that event my quest for answers slowly diminished and my enjoyment in simply reliving it grew.

Yesterday I was sitting with Harry and Ron in the common room. Harry and Ron were playing a game of wizard chess as they discussed the upcoming Quidditch game. I watched them play and idly turned the pages of my potions book. I had looked down in an attempt to actually retain some of the information but when I didn't succeed I looked up, only to see Malfoy's eyes staring into mine. My breath hitched and I nearly jumped. I couldn't understand how he had gotten in here. Surely someone would have made a fuss about it and I would have seen him enter. But there he was, his grey eyes searching mine.

I was dumbstruck, as I couldn't turn my eyes away. They seemed familiar, like I had seen them like this before. They held such emotion, such passion that I could feel it entering my body. I lifted my hand to touch his cheek when I was shaken. Harry was yelling my name asking me if I was all right.

I closed my eyes and when I opened them I was met with Harry's green worried eyes. I simply told him I was fine and looked down at my book signaling that I didn't wish to discuss it. Harry seemed put off by my evasion but let me have it as he returned to his game.

My daydreams about him seemed to be growing more and more intense. I wanted answers, needed answers. Maybe having answers would be the cure to my breaks in reality. I sat in the library, hoping to keep my mind in the present. A large tome on dreams sat on the table before me as I tried to find a way to keep from dreaming about him. I sat there, trying to find something I could use when I heard the sound of paper crunching. I looked up to see who might be disrupting my peace with their noise when I saw a little paper lion running to me.

I closed my eyes and rubbed them; honestly thinking I was going insane, yet when I opened them there he was. He was standing on top of my dream book meowing at me. He was made of red paper and he obviously wanted me to touch him. I looked around trying to find the source of the paper lion, but I seemed to be the only one enjoying the library. I looked at him again wondering if I should touch him. My curiosity won out in the end as I lifted my hand to touch his head. The second my fingers swiped the paper, he unfolded and a note lay in his wake.

I looked at the note just as I looked at the lion, with caution and concern. But again my curiosity as to who had sent him won over my common sense and I picked it up to read what was written. I gasped and looked around quickly before reading the note again. 'Care to chat?' It was simple, it was witty and it was from him. Though it wasn't signed I knew it had to be from him.

I picked up my quill and frantically thought of something to write back. For all my years of knowing exactly what to do and say I was again at a loss. When it came to him my mind seemed to turn off. I wrote down the first thing I could think of, 'sure.' It was horribly lame but I couldn't think of anything else to say. I looked down at my one word and shook my head before I continued, 'what would you like to chat about?' There, that was better. I put my quill back on the desk and thought about how I would get it back to him. I didn't know the spell he used to make it turn into a lion so how would I return the note. I was close to banging my head on the table when the lion popped up, meowed at me once more before running down the table and onto the floor. I watched it run behind some bookshelves as I was left to wait for his reply.

I looked back at my book in an attempt to pass the time but I was too anxious. I could feel my heart beating in my chest as I thought about talking to him. One of my legs was bouncing as I tried to steady my breathing. I don't know what had come over me. I was flush and I felt like my stomach was doing back flips. Where was this feeling coming from, what was happening to me? This was Malfoy we were talking about. I shouldn't be having this reaction to him.

Soon the lion came bounding back, happy to be put to use. I smiled at him he really was adorable. This time he ran right into my awaiting hand and unfolded instantly. I looked down at the words and a slow smile crept upon my face. 'Anything you like, I just want to chat.'

I couldn't tell you why the statement made me so happy but knowing he wanted to seek me out just as I did him was enough to make me content. I picked up my quill again and ran the feather along the side of my face. What did I want to say to him? I could be coy, flirt with him a bit. But that just wasn't me. I could be brave, use my Gryffindor courage and bring up the other night. Or I could take the safe route and ask, 'how have you been?' Another lame response but it was the best I could manage at the moment.

The lion once again sprung to life and scurried off, excited to show its master what it had brought him. This time I was less anxious I awaited his response. I was simply content waiting to see how he would respond. I was still rather confused about what I was feeling. This was so wrong. If Harry and Ron knew what I was doing, what I had done, I don't know how they would react. Ron might go off and kill Malfoy, or me. I bit my lip as I looked about the library. It was best not to dwell on those thoughts while speaking with the enemy. I might lose what little courage I have within me and stop speaking with him. I knew that was the last thing I wanted to do.

This time I didn't even notice the little lion's return until he was pawing at my hand. I looked down and smiled as he unfolded for me and revealed his master's words. 'Not good. I'm a bit confused at the moment.'

The back flips were back as my heart joined my organs in their movement. What did he mean by confused? What was he confused about? The questions were returning as I set out to respond to him. 'What might you be confused about, if you don't mind me asking?' I hurried the little lion along on his journey as I waited for an answer. I knew that when seeking answers from Malfoy your never knew what you would be getting in return. I could be getting a snide remark, an ambiguous answer or, I swallowed at the last one and shook my head. I was letting my thoughts run away from me.

The kiss was vividly stuck in my thoughts as I tapped my finger on the book. What was he writing? What was he going to say? I saw his eyes again, his beautiful grey eyes. I could feel his body heat, his breath on my neck. I closed my eyes and just thought about him. I remembered they way his skin felt, the smell of his cologne, and the way he looked at me right before he kissed me.

I was once again alerted to the presence of the lion by it pawing at my hand. I looked at him for a moment, weary of what might be lying behind the delicate folds. I flipped my hand over so my palm was presented to him. Content with my motion he pounced into my hand and unraveled. I took a deep breath before looking down to see what he wrote.

'I am confused about everything it seems these days. But the one thing that is causing me the most confusion is you.'

Me. He was just as confused as I was. It was a relief yet also another burden. As the questions came to me I began to write them. 'Me? What about me is so confusing for you?' I dropped my quill and waited for the paper to become reanimated. It soon folded itself back up and I watched as my new questions ran off to get new answers.

I seemed to have the most trouble getting answers from him, for every time I asked him a question his answers left me with even more questions than I began with. That was the one frustrating thing about speaking with Malfoy; he was such a puzzle to me. I always wondered how Malfoy thought, what was his drive in life, what made him act the way he did?

I knew barely anything about the boy I was passing notes with. I knew of his horrid father and aunt and their death eater history. I knew his history with me and his prejudice that I assume he gained from his father. I knew of Snape's favoritism of the boy, yet I didn't know where it derived from. Aside from those outer things I knew nothing of importance about his life or his history. Most of my knowledge of him was from assumptions I had made throughout our years of interaction. Aside from our rendezvous a week past I had never had a real conversation that is until today.

The lion meowed angrily at me when I did not respond to his pawing. I seemed to have drifted deeper into thought then I knew and smiled down at the small thing as I took him into my hand. He unfolded for me to reveal that mister Malfoy had provided me with many words; hopefully I would not gain many more questions from his answer.

I closed my eyes and tried to ready myself for what I was to read before glancing down at the note. 'I don't really know how to describe my confusion to you without saying that you just generally confuse me. Last week...' it seemed he stopped here for his words started a little bit further from the others, 'was a highly confusing and has caused a lot of confusion in my life. What we did would not have mattered much if it weren't for who you are. Since then I have...' he seemed to have stopped again, 'missed you. And that fact alone has caused me a lot confusion; yet, there is more to be had when dealing with you.'

I didn't know what to say. This moment, this unguarded view into the thoughts of Malfoy was, confusing. He had missed me; he admitted that he missed me. Had I missed him? I sat there, contemplating that question. Had I truly missed him or was the fact that I was on a quest for answers what kept me thinking of him. Was it my drive to understand him and his actions the motivation behind my intense daydreams? or was there more behind that?

The lion seemed to know I needed more time contemplate my response as he folded himself back together and now played with the pages of my book. I watched him frolic as I waited for the answer to my own question, yet I didn't get one. That provoked another question; did he really miss me or was he on the same quest for answers like me? I had hoped to gain actual answers to my questions rather than more questions, but I was dealing with Malfoy and slowly learned that hoping for that was futile.

I picked up my quill and tapped the feather to my chin. What could I say to that, how could I respond to such an unguarded moment and tell him my thoughts when I didn't even know what I was truly thinking? I decided to go with what I always went with, honesty.

I motioned to the lion I was ready to write and he gladly unfolded before me. I took a deep breath and thought for another moment on how I would start before putting ink to paper. 'I must admit that last week was also highly confusing for me as well. Ever since then my mind has been riddled with questions that I have desperately been seeking answers to. I am also coming to learn that when dealing with you there is also more to be had than what I ever expected.' I paused, unsure of where to go from there. Should I say I missed him in return or should I tell him my theory on it? Should I even mention it at all? I sighed as I resumed writing, 'I have been thinking about you a lot lately, especially when it involves last week. I have so many questions about last week that I wish I could get answers to but I fear by asking them your answer may invoke more questions. I don't know if I could handle more questions now. I scarcely know the answers to the question I am asking myself. I am, however, glad that we are having this conversation.'

I re-read my work before nodding. I set my quill down and leaned back in my chair. I was now incredibly curious as to how he would respond, yet I knew curiosity was what got me in this position in the first place. As the little lion scampered off I wondered if this could become a regular thing between Malfoy and I. I wondered if I would find myself passing notes with him more often, if I would have more conversations with this mysterious Slytherin. I was not put off by the idea of making this a habit; in fact I hoped that this would become something.

I turned to watch the arrival of the little lion. He seemed to be tiring, his travels between us wearing on the magic placed upon him. I reached out to him and he plopped right into my hand, folding a little slower than before. I smiled at the poor thing as I read his response. 'I'm glad we're having this conversation as well. I honestly thought you wouldn't respond or you would'nt listen to me. I also understand what you mean about not being able to answer your own questions, I find myself I'm having problems with that too. I hope that you find some comfort in the fact that you are not alone in that area. I would be willing to answer questions though, if you ever want to ask them. I hope that by in answer questions I might get answers in return.'

His response seemed more abrupt than the others but maybe he was reaching for words just as I was. I smiled at his sentence, 'I hope that you find some comfort in the fact that you are not alone in that area.' It was comforting to know that I wasn't the only one questioning what was going on between us. I wondered where we stood and would stand if we continued these little chats. It was something that both excited yet scared me. I knew, in the back of my mind, that this could be a trap. He could be using these chats to become closer to me, break my barriers and gain information for Voldemort. I didn't want that to be true though, I wanted this to be pure and untainted for I was letting myself become comfortable with the thought of speaking with him, and I didn't want that to be something I would regret later.

I picked up my quill and did what I knew I shouldn't be doing. 'I would like to ask you those questions, you think we could do this again?' I watched the lion slowly fold back together and he seemed to sigh as he scampered off back to him. I waited patiently, my nerves staying silent as I waited for the arrival of what could be a life changing answer.

The lion appeared faster than I thought he would and with renewed energy. He scampered up into my palm and showed me the words that would affect me for the rest of my life. 'I would really like to do this again. Until then, Hermione.'

I smiled and wrote my response as I sent the lion on his way. I wrapped myself in his cloak as I looked around the empty library before gathering my things. I left the library with a smile, his cologne still lingering on the cloth.

Little did I know that a pair of grey eyes followed my retreating back, a smile playing across pale lips as the owner read my words, 'Until then, Draco.'

Author Note: So here is the next installment of passing notes. I got the idea of origami notes from PotterEntourage on my coloured grey account. I liked the idea and ran with it thus creating this moment between them. Also thank you to everyone who reviewed and to my wonderful beta Stephanie, you all rock my socks. I also want to give a special shout out to my best friend Ted who kept me in character and put up with me ignoring him to write this, he deserves cookies and hugs. I hoped you all enjoyed it and please let me know what you thought. Much love and thanks.


	4. Chapter 4

I can recall the first time I truly understood the beauty that was Hermione

I can recall the first time I truly understood the beauty that was Hermione. It was at the Yule Ball our fourth year. I had, begrudgingly, agreed to take Parkinson to the ball and was not looking forward to it in the least. Though I looked dashing in my black velvet dress robes, standing next to that pug could only bring my appearance down. She had tried her best to 'pretty' up by wearing a ridiculously frilly pink thing and had only minimally succeeded.

I was coming to grips with the fact that this would be a long, boring night when she entered with the Durmstrang students. At first I was like everyone else, wondering who that gorgeous creature was who accompanied Krum. Not even her best mates could tell it was her. She wore floaty blue dress robes that were simple yet exquisite. When she walked her body would be outlined and you could scarcely make out the slim physique she hid under her frumpy school robes. Her entire aura seemed to be different somehow. As she walked, flashing her nervous smile to all she passed, it was as if she wasn't the bookworm we had come to know and loathe. She was the Bulgarian princess who accompanied their prized prince. She seemed regal and delicate and…pureblood.

That was the first time I forgot anything I once knew about her and just absorbed the vision she was that evening. As we passed Pansy couldn't help but gape at the beauty she could never compare to and I was left wordless. There was no flaw I could find to pick at and now, as I observed her across the Great Hall at dinner, I was left with the same feeling.

She had her bushy hair somewhat tamed. It was retracted into a messy bun with little ringlets falling gracefully around her face. Her cloak, which I had a sneaking suspicion was not her cloak and yet my missing one, was left open revealing her school uniform.

The thought of Granger wearing my cloak brought about the actions that had ensued the past week. The air within the halls held a chill as fall began to wane and winter slowly roused. I had been wearing my old cloak, much to the amusement of my fellow Slytherins. The questions about its whereabouts had begun as all Slytherin eyes were watching to see which beautiful witch adorned it. Pansy had made it her personal mission to find that certain witch and tell her to back off. I knew the time for me to retrieve my cloak from Granger had arrived yet with the extra eyes watching my movements, contacting her would come to be difficult.

The last I saw of my cloak was when we had passed notes in the library. The promise of another exchange had been lingering on my mind yet the downfall to being ungodly popular was the fact that free time was hard to come by. If it wasn't Crabbe and Goyle following me about like lost puppies it was Pansy drooling all over my robes. I knew I needed to send her another note. I was anxious to have another exchange though and as I watched her I decided tonight would be the night. Snape had assigned us another long and impossibly complex essay so Granger would undoubtedly return to the library tonight.

After our night in the library I had begun to accept the idea that I was indeed drawn to Granger. Though I still thought myself mental, I was slowly accepting that no matter how I berated myself I was still left with these feelings. Though the idea of the dark prince of Slytherin conversing with a lowly mud blood still seemed outlandish I knew I didn't want to stop our encounters. This year had brought about a sort of change in me that I never would have suspected. If you had told me last year that I would be plotting schemes in order to speak with Granger I would have sent you straight to Saint Mungos; and yet, here I am pushing my food around my plate, waiting for her to rise and head to our impromptu meeting place.

"Bloody ridiculous."

"What is?" I turned to look at my personal demon as Pansy's nasal voice raped my eardrums.

"What are you on about now?" I don't think I could handle another four hundred-question inquiry as to where my cloak was, who had it, and if I still found her as pretty as the day I first saw her. If she only knew the low standards I held her beauty at she would no longer find the need to ask me such a question. Though I knew her reaction to me saying my true thoughts on the matter would only bring about more questions and more time spent listening to Pansy yip.

She wrinkled her pug nose as she gave a very unattractive snort. "You said 'bloody ridiculous'. I was wondering what you where talking about."

If I wasn't a Malfoy I would have blushed, but being the proud Malfoy I am I simply scowled. I hadn't noticed I had spoken aloud. I was so caught up in my thoughts that I must have spoken without noticing. I didn't know what could have been worse, that I was highly caught up in thoughts that revolved around a certain bushy haired witch or that I had been partially caught in doing so. They say the first sign of madness was talking to yourself; maybe my little outburst was a sign that I was heading down that path. "I was simply thinking about something, don't worry about it."

Obviously that answer did not please my little beast of burden as she prepared to torture me with her highly abrasive voice. "What were you thinking about that was so ridiculous?"

And it began. First it would be simple questions, then she would make a comment about the weather and how it was turning. Then, and this is my personal favorite, she would bring up the topic of my now least favorite cloak and it's whereabouts. Soon I will be listening to her shriek as she plots conspiracy theories as to what and/or who might have my cloak.

I tried to think of something that would avoid this oncoming torture and allow me to leave when the time was right. My answer soon rolled into my head as I turned to Pansy with my notorious smirk. "I was thinking about the stupid essay Snape has assigned. It will take me all of the three weeks assigned to finish it. I was thinking of going to the library to work on it after dinner."

It was then that I caught movement at the Gryffindor table. She had risen, my black cloak billowing around her small frame. She smiled at her two idiots as she gathered her twenty books and headed out. By her solo departure I knew that my assumption was indeed correct and could almost leap with joy. Tonight we would speak and maybe begin a tradition of meeting in her favorite place. Now all I had to do was ditch my tormentor and I could be on my way.

I rose as well, thinking it best to give her as little reaction time as possible. I gathered my things as I spoke to her. "In fact I am going to go now. I feel full and if I work until the library closes then I may make a significant dent in my workload. Bye Pansy." And with that I was all but running out of the hall. I could hear Pansy attempting to offer her response as I walked away. Hopefully she would not become a larger annoyance and follow me. I looked behind me, frightening myself with my own thoughts, that was the last thing I needed, that monster even thinking I had anything to do with Granger.

That train of thought led me to an even scarier place, the idea that Pansy would find out. Her reaction could be devastating. She would yell and scream and wonder what I was doing. Then her reaction could turn one of two ways. She could become teary, asking why I had forsaken her for someone of a lesser blood. I would cup her face and look into her eyes with the carefully practiced look of love and caring. I would tell her it was just a fling or a plan to help advance my mission in bringing down our headmaster. I would tell her it was nothing and we would kiss and she would be content once again.

Or it could turn down a way I hope it doesn't. She would become cold and calculated, she could think of the best way to ruin me for cheating on her. First she would start with our house, she would tell them of my exploits with Granger thus making me lose my contacts and allies within the house. Then she would go to all the other houses painting me to be weak and to be turning my back on the Dark Lord. This would obviously reach my father, which would never bode well. He would probably torture me or kill me just to please his master. This road would be one I would avoid at all costs.

I once again seemed to be lost in my thoughts as I returned from them to find my feet had taken me to my desired location. The library was once again empty, many of the students either returning to their bedrooms to sleep for the evening, or finding other fun ways to spend the remainder of their evening. Either way it was the perfect atmosphere to once again make contact with my new obsession. I walked around the library, looking to see if there was a glimmer of light that could signal me to her location. I moved to the Dark Arts area to find her sitting, surrounded by tomes larger than her.

I smirked at her predictability. Her want to excel was something I once scorned but now I only saw it as an endearing factor of her personality. It was this element of her, this knowledge-seeking bit that had brought me to her in the first place and I would never deny its wonder ever again. I moved down the opposite row of her, moving ever closer to her light. When I could see her through the bookshelves I sat at the table and arranged all my things. To any passerby it would appear as if I was working on my essay and refused to remain near a mud blood to do so.

I set my books around me, opening them at random intervals to make it appear as if I was deep in studying. I pulled out my parchment and thought of which animal I should do today. The last time I had picked her trusty mascot knowing she would find it amusing. This time I thought I should pick something relevant to me so I changed the color of my parchment to green and then cast the spell to change it into a snake. My house animal slithered around the table, waiting for me to reach out, etch a message into its skin and send it on its way.

This was the hard part, thinking of what to say to her. I never knew how to start the conversation. A simple hello would never do but how else do you being a conversation without the basic pleasantries? It was then that I thought of the topic of tonight's conversation that I knew what I had to write. I laid my hand flat on the table, palm up as I waited for the snake to come. He glided over my potions book to come into my hand where he unfolded. I smiled to myself as I wrote the first words of tonight's exchange, 'you know it is dangerous to be wearing my cloak about. People my see it and figure out our secret.'

I leaned back and waited for my snake to transform. When he was back into his animal state I picked him up and whispered to him the person unto which he would deliver my message, 'Hermione Granger'. With his target selected he slithered out of my hand, down the table post and off between the shelves.

I listened to hear her reaction. Last time I had distanced myself further from her, afraid that my close proximity may bring about unwanted attention but tonight I did not care. As I waited for the lion to return the previous time I wondered what she had done and, if at all, said to herself. Her responses always seemed well planned and thought out, just like everything she did. She took the time to make sure what she was saying was relevant and correct and I wondered what she did to come up with those answers.

I heard her gasp, as she must have noticed my snake. I hope I did not frighten her with my choice of animal. I knew many did not love snakes as I did and she may even go as far as to have a deep fear of them. It was at that that I began to mentally hit myself. I should have stayed with the lion. She would always react better to the lion, it being her symbol and all.

Silence ensued as I waited to hear if she would do anything to alert me to her thoughts. She was such an enigma to me, always hard to figure out what might be going on in her head. Though some of her actions were predictable, the fact that she would always stick up for her stooges and come to the library to begin work on something not due for weeks, her thoughts were ever elusive and hard to figure. She was a complex creature and that complexity may be another thing that brought me ever more attracted to her. I could feel myself drawn to her as if she were a veela. If I did not know better I would suspect her of having a veela origin but since I seemed to be the only unlucky soul caught in her enchantment I knew that to be false.

Soon my snake returned to me, a bit miffed by something Granger must have done. It didn't seem like I had to wait long before receiving a response but then again I had left my body to wonder around in my thoughts. My perception of time could be muddled and the only evidence to her long pause was my snake's agitated state. I placed my hand on the table and waited for the snake to unravel and show me her words.

He slowly eyed my hand, seeing if he should strike or relent to my wishes. He soon gave up his idea of retaliation upon me and entered my palm. As soon as paper touched my skin her twisted and bent into the clean sheet of parchment that held her sloppy yet endearing script. 'It is also dangerous to be passing notes to one another, yet you seem intent on doing so. It seems we are both committing dangerous acts.'

There it was, her sharp and witty reply. I couldn't help but smile as I knew exactly how to respond to that. I picked up my quill and dipped it in the Egyptian ink I had opened on the desk. 'Very true; however, me writing you a note is very different than me wearing your cloak. I am surprised your two dunderheads haven't asked you where it came from. Or maybe they did and you lied to them, since if you told them it was mine I would assume you all would not be speaking, which clearly you still are.'

I re-read my words as I nodded and sent the snake back over to my conversation partner. I leaned back in my chair and placed my hands behind my head. I knew she would come up with something smart and witty that would not only catch me off guard but also force me to think of the amazing extent of her wit and intelligence. I was always behind her in marks, much to my father's annoyance. She had come here with a knowledge most purebloods did not possess. She was always willing to answer every question presented to her just to prove she was capable. I realized my mocking of her had only driven her to excel more to prove she was not as lowly as I made her to seem. My teasing which had been meant to break her and allow me to rise had been my defeat. It fueled her determination and will and allowed her to grow and gain abilities I would never be able grasp.

My snake roused me once again from my thoughts as he slithered up my leg and into my lap. He was in a much better state this time around so I judged he gathered a quick response. I allowed him to enter my hand and brought the unfolded parchment closer so I could read it. 'I told them I had borrowed a friends cloak and had yet to return it. They asked a few questions but it was nothing I could not handle. How have your friends been taking the absence of your much talked about Italian cloak?'

I rolled my eyes. The last thing I wanted to think about was Pansy's questions. Yet she had asked and I would give her an answer. 'Like any other Slytherin's would, poked fun at me and wondered which beautiful girl was wearing it this time. I wonder how they would respond if they knew the beautiful girl was the Golden Trios' bookworm? I almost chucked as I thought how she would respond to being called beautiful. Would she accept the compliment with thanks, would she ignore it or would she try to fit it?

As the snake went about its business of delivering my response I went back into my thoughts to wait it would be a shame if she couldn't see the beauty she was. Though she was not what people would deem a classic beauty she was one none-the less. She was a catch, something to be fought for. She was not easy like some of the girls I had found myself laying with, she was something to work for. I doubted she had ever been with a man. Though she had been with Krum for a time our fourth year I doubt she would have given herself to him. And then there was weasel. I heard people speak about how they thought those two would be wed one day. I hoped Granger had more sense than to lower herself by marrying a blood traitor.

Blood traitor, was that what I was now? Here I was thinking of a mud blood in the best of lights and not even caring that she is beneath me. Was I truly becoming what I hated? No, I had no intentions of mixing blood by having sex with her. I was simply curious as to her and am just fulfilling my curiosity. She had enveloped my mind and the only way to get her out was to follow it along. I was attracted to her, yes, but it was simply curiosity. This sudden revelation that I may become something as distasteful as a blood traitor made me question why I was doing this.

When the snake returned I was less inclined to read it. The part of me that knew better told me to leave it and just go back to the common room. I had just realized how dangerous the path I am on was. Nothing good could come from this, whatever it was. I pushed back my chair, intent on leaving. I had things to do, a mission to complete, and nothing could stand in the way of it. If I stayed she would only entrap me further and it could only complicate things. I began to gather my books, not noticing the racket I was making. I had to go, this was just a bad idea. Then my thoughts on Pansy came back and all that could happen to me if this was discovered. This was the most stupid thing I have ever…

"Leaving so soon?" I stopped moving and looked at the owner of that sweet voice. There she was, leaning against the bookshelves. She must have been attracted by the noise I had made and come to investigate. There was that knowledge seeking attitude shining through. And now that I was faced with my odd temptation I was left wondering why I was leaving again.

I looked down at my pack and then back up at her. "I thought it best to cut our conversation short."

Her face betrayed her; you could clearly tell she was hurt by my words. She quickly glanced at the snake that held her unread words. I wondered what she wrote to me. I shook my head; it was that blasted curiosity that was leading me to a trouble I wished not to face. "And why would you want to do that? Was it something I said?"

Now I truly wondered what she had said to me. I gathered the snake and tried to avoid its bites as I placed it in my pack. My damned curiosity would be the end of me and this girl was bringing that end closer and closer. She had moved away from the bookshelves and had come closer to me. I could feel her honey eyes on me and if I looked into them I knew I would be trapped by her enchantment. I was so confused again. Things I had been taught all my life, lessons I clung to, were crumbling around me and it was all because of this stupid, beautiful, mud blood.

I shook my head, refusing to look at her. "No, it was something I thought of while sitting here." Why was I still talking to her? I should insult her, call her a filthy mud blood and return to my boring and safe life. Return to what I knew and understood and get out of this place of confusion.

"And what was that?" She was starting to remind me of Pansy with her questions. It was good; maybe if I regarded her as Pansy I would have no issue of insulting her and leaving her here, ending this dangerous game.

I gathered all my Malfoy pride and strength and looked up at her. The second I saw her unsure eyes it evaporated and I was lost within her. I hated myself at that moment. How could this stupid girl have gotten under my skin so quickly? One kiss and a few notes later and here I was, putty in her delicate hands. Where had my hard shell gone, my snide remarks, my utter contempt?

I couldn't hurt her, though I had an insult ready to lash at her I couldn't send it hurling toward her. She seemed so vulnerable, so meek and I couldn't bring myself to hurt her. I stood, leaving my pack to fall to the floor. I looked down at her, reminded of how much shorter she was than me. I squeezed my hand into a fist, trying to keep myself from touching her, but it was more than I could handle. I soon found my hand on her cheek, then moving to her wild ringlets falling from its confines. Every time I touched her hair I couldn't help but be mystified by how smooth it was. It was as if silk was touching my fingertips and no reason to why it was always so untamed.

I took a deep breath and look away from her eyes and to my hand that was playing with her hair. "We are truly playing a dangerous game and I just realized how dangerous it really is." I was trapped and I knew it. I was no longer intent on returning to my common room, but rather staying here and enjoying the company that she provided. I recall a saying that stated you want what you can't have. At that moment I understood the meaning of those words. I knew no matter what we did, where we went, we would never be able to be anything to each other; yet, that's all I wanted. I don't know what I wanted to be to her but I knew I wanted to be something.

She didn't touch me but I felt her eyes on my chest. She moved her hand to my shirt and played with a button. "Yes, I suppose we are."

A silence enveloped us as we played with our selected items: her my shirt buttons, and me her silky hair. Neither of us dared speak word weather out of fear of what would be said or a lack of knowing exactly what to say. She spoke first as her fingers stilled with their play. "Is that so bad?"

I knew what she was getting at and I sighed. The words were spilling from my lips before I could even think of them. "I honestly don't know. You are everything I have been taught to hate yet here I am, seeking you out. And while I think of you I am turning into something I don't know if I want to be." I stopped playing with her hair and closed my eyes; she was looking up at my face, requesting I look at her. I just couldn't, the feelings that were coursing through me, the emotions I didn't understand would bring me to do something I didn't know if I wanted or not.

"What are you becoming?" It was a simple question but to me it was loaded with so many more. Her voice was so soft and she had refused to turn away from looking at me.

I took another deep breath and caught scent of her shampoo. It broke me more and I could barely respond. "A blood traitor."

Saying those words broke me from my weak state and renewed my will to leave. I thanked Merlin that I had gathered my things as I grabbed my pack and left her just as quickly as I had left Pansy before. I could again hear her take in breath in order to respond but I was already too far away. I had run like a coward. My actions were unbefitting to a Malfoy and yet the actions I was running from where even more against the Malfoy code. I was so lost and confused that I decided not to contact her again. As far as I was concerned our exchanges had come to an end.

Author's Note: HI!! So Mother's day came about and it got me thinking about how I had been neglecting my story like a bad mother so I sat down, plotted out my plot up to chapter sixteen and am now on a quest to get a chapter up AT LEAST once a week. Hopefully I will be able to make that happen. So be expecting more to come. Also I changed a few things in chapters one and two I just changed Snape teaching potions to Snape teaching DADA making it sixth year. Just wanted to let you all know so that you wouldn't have to go back and re-read it and be like DUDE WTF!? Please review and let me know what you think and what you think should happen. Your reviews truly inspire me to write and give me fuel to continue. I love you all and thanks again to my betas, you rock my socks guys!!


	5. Chapter 5

I had been sitting in the library for another hour after Draco left just thinking

I had been sitting in the library for another hour after Draco left just thinking. It seemed that these days I was more lost in thought than I ever had been. My thoughts, no matter how they began, always lead me to him. I wondered how his day was going, how he was doing in his school work and now, as I sat mindlessly flipping the pages of my book, I wondered if we would ever speak again.

I didn't know what I expected from this makeshift friendship. I truly enjoyed conversing with him, for what particular reasons I could not pinpoint, but I did enjoy it. It was stimulating, new, and ever so intriguing. So the idea of it never commencing again was all but heartbreaking

But he had seemed so torn and confused. At the time I thought his reaction was due to my response. I had taken a risk and had written something I would deem now as out of character. I was shocked that he had called me beautiful. It had truly thrown me through some loops. And as I sat writing I went with instinct instead of reason. I had picked up my quill with a type of determination and had written, before I could think about it any better, 'they don't have to know if we don't want them to. We could keep it between us.'

I had sent the snake on his way, cringing at what his response could be. Soon my nervousness had overtaken me and I was quickly following the snake. Another shock came when I noticed he was all but one meter away from me. That, naturally, sparked my curiosity. Why had he been so close and had not dared to just sit with me? Had he sat so close on our previous conversation?

I am a naturally inquisitive being and as these thoughts gathered in my brain I took the chance to examine him. He seemed so forlorn and deep in his thoughts I could only begin to imagine. He leaned his elbows on the desk and cradled his head in his palms. As he thought, he would make small noises only lending me a glimpse into his emotions. From what I had heard he was not pleased with whatever he was thinking and that had made me feel worse. I hadn't intended my response to be so upsetting. I actually didn't know what I intended with my response but I knew I did not want him upset. When he pushed his chair back and seemed to be readying himself to leave I knew I had to step forward and say something.

"Leaving so soon?" I leaned against the bookshelves, trying to keep my legs from turning into jelly. I was so nervous, had my response truly given him such a terrible mood? He had glanced at me, then at his bag before returning back to look at me. He seemed to be contemplating his choice of words and when he spoke I was able to feel the extent of his trouble.

"I thought it best to cut our conversation short." I didn't wish to show it but that response had wounded me. I was such a fool, taking such an uncalculated risk by saying such things. How could I have been so stupid?

I gathered my Gryffindor courage and steadied my voice, "And why would you want to do that? Was it something I said?" He wasn't looking at me and it unnerved me more. Had my words really been that bad? I knew it was rather forward of me to say those things but never had I imaged that it would turn out this badly. I moved forward so that I could try and see into his eyes. I just needed to know what he was thinking.

It was then that he spoke, as if knowing the intense desire I held for answers. "No, it was something I thought of while sitting here." I should have known. Speaking with him never calmed my thirst for understanding when it came to him. Though I learn more about the elusive Slytherin, one answer only brought about more questions.

I was so unsure about all of this. Soon doubt began to trickle into my thoughts. What if this was a horrible mistake? Should I really be risking so much to speak to someone I barely cared for? But I knew the answer to that question at least. Since our first encounter he had slowly been intruding upon not only my thoughts but my heart as well. Though I hated to admit it I held some sort of affection for my childhood tormentor and even if it troubled me I could not turn away from him, from this.

I decided to continue asking questions in hopes of gaining some sort of definitive answer so with nerves clear in my tone I asked, "And what was that?"

He stared down at me then, finally looking at me. I wish he hadn't. His stance, his look, everything brought me back to the moment when we first kissed and I could feel my hands itching to touch him. I took a deep breath and fisted my hands, trying to compel them to remain at my side. I had hardly pained attention to him when I felt his hand on my cheek.

It was as if he had shocked me. I looked right into his eyes as his fingers brushed my cheeks. I could feel them warm under his touch, whether that was the reason behind it I was not sure. His hand then moved from my cheek to my ungodly mass of hair. His fingers idly played with a ringlet that had escaped from the confines of my bun. He seemed so far away as he studied my hair. It was as if he wasn't even standing before me. It was then that he turned his gaze away and prepared to speak.

"We are truly playing a dangerous game and I just realized how dangerous it really is." I thought of his words as I followed his lead and moved my eyes to his chest. I had never given much thought to what would happen if our meetings were to be discovered. I guess Harry and Ron would not be pleased, certainly not Ron. Harry might give me a chance to explain but Ron would be more livid than when I had gone to the Yule Ball with Viktor. I thought harder about his words and then realized the danger he would be in if this were to be revealed.

This game as he called it was much more threatening to him than to me. I can just imagine what would happen to him if his fellow Slytherin's would say if they caught wind of this, let alone what his father would say. I sighed and reached up to caress a button on his shirt. "Yes, I suppose we are." But I couldn't let go of what we had begun to build. I didn't know what to say, what to do but I knew that I did not want this to be the last of our conversations. They had just begun, and I was just now starting to see the man I saw our first night. I just had to know, "Is that so bad?"

He seemed to be completely out of sorts as he spoke. "I honestly don't know. You are everything I have been taught to hate, yet here I am, seeking you out. And while I think of you I am turning into something I don't know if I want to be." I looked at him as he spoke, and when he shut his eyes I felt him drawing away. My mind was racing with questions but the one I couldn't get was, "What are you becoming?"

I wasn't prepared for his answer; I don't think anything could have prepared me for his answer. He took a deep breath and when the words left his mouth I felt as if I was being struck. "A blood traitor."

I wrapped his cloak around me as I looked at the place he once stood. I rubbed my face in it, smelling the expensive cologne I had come to find as my comfort. I had lived in my own world since the day he kissed me and in that world I had forgotten of his blood ties. Whenever I spoke to him I never thought of blood or the war, it was as if I had forgotten it all and just enjoyed the moments we shared. But to have reality hit me so hard and suddenly had left me sitting, thinking of the reality of it all.

All my thoughts kept bringing me to the same conclusion; this would be the last time I spoke with the youngest Malfoy. He was right, continuing to have these encounters would not be wise and though I had come to love them dearly I could not have him risking anything for me. We would remain as we were, two people on completely different sides of the spectrum; yet, there was a catch. I still held possession of his cloak.

I sighed and let the cloak fall loosely around my body as I began to gather my things. Returning it to him would be troublesome, as I did not want our meetings to be known. I couldn't just walk up to him in the great hall and hand it back to him. I suppose I could owl it back to him using a school owl. No one would know it was me who sent it and he would have his cloak back without us having to meet again.

I finished packing as I removed his cloak from my shoulders. Yes, that would be the most logical solution. I took his cloak and folded it neatly. I would send it with the morning post and then I could put everything behind me and remember it as a fleeting moment.

The next morning I woke early and prepared his robe for delivery. I wrapped it in parchment and tied it with a hair ribbon of lavenders'. She had so many I doubt she would notice one missing. I prepared myself for the day then marched out to the owlery. As I tied the package to the owl's leg a sudden wave of longing washed over me. I had grown attached to the garment, as silly as that may be. I had slept with it every night. The smell it held, the soft feel of the fabric, it was so comforting to me that I would miss it. It was my last connection to him, my last reason for every seeing him again and I was sending it to him in a way so that we would not meet.

I doubted my plan. What if I should give it to him, what if he was insulted by me not returning it to him in person? But as those thoughts came I knew they were my wistful fantasy. The way he left the night before, it was clear that he did not desire another meeting so with a treat to the owl I watched as he took off to deliver my last message to Draco.

I don't remember returning from the great hall, nor do I remember placing the food I was now eating on my plate. I do remember when Harry and Ron joined me for breakfast because it was at that moment that the questions began.

"'Mione, you feelin' all right?" It was Ron. I hadn't realized that I was so down until Ron had spoken to me. Him being the less observant of the two I knew if Ron could notice my melancholy state then so could everyone else.

I shook my head and gave him the best smile I could muster. "Of course Ronald, I'm fine. Why wouldn't I be?"

Harry was the one to answer that time. "Because you called him Ronald and you only do that when you are either upset or lying." Though I loved my boys greatly Harry's intuition was sometimes more trouble than good.

I kept my sunny demeanor as I shook them off, "Please I am fine really, I just have so much on my mind with school and your silly potions book." I knew mentioning the book would make Harry leave the topic alone. He knew my displeasure in him using the Half Blood Prince's side notes very well and would not want to make an argument of it with so many ears present.

Ron snorted as he shoveled food onto his plate and began to eat. We soon fell into our regular morning chatter as the post came. Though I tried I couldn't keep my eyes from going to my lost conversation partner. I had the feeling that by sending it by post I was not doing the right thing and I just had to know his reaction. I watched as owl by owl flew past until suddenly my package fell into his morning oatmeal. The look of shock did not go unnoticed by his mates, as Parkinson seemed to badger him about who it was from.

When he opened it the whole lot of Slytherins around him became quite loud as a million questions were shot at him at once but through it all his eyes meet mine. I couldn't tell the emotion he held in them. Was it hurt, gratefulness, or something completely different? From such a distance I could not tell but I knew he was giving me a look. As quickly as the look came it turned as he went about answer the questions from his peers.

I still didn't feel right, all day I was wondering if I had done the right thing by sending it through the post. Parkinson had made a huge fuss about it the whole day. Everywhere I seemed to turn her annoying chatter filled the air. If it wasn't questions of who had it, it was questions about his supposed infidelity to her. I had heard him on more than one occasion state that it was none of her business who he was with but that never sufficed the girl's curiosity.

The more I heard her talk about it the more I came to the realization that I had made a mistake. I should have just sent it to him that evening instead of making a big spectacle out of it by sending it with the post. Or I should have done as my instinct told me and brought it to him myself. By the end of the day I needed to get away from everything and just forget about Draco.

It was harder than I thought. The more I didn't want to think about him the more I thought about him. Soon I was drifting off into daydreams where we were speaking by the lake, or hiding away in an empty classroom discussing the mishap that was sending his cloak. So when I opened my eyes to see him sitting across from me in the library I took it as being another of my fantasies.

"Must I honestly continue to daydream about this?" I spoke aloud, assuming that if it was my daydream I could say anything I wanted without consequence.

"Oh, so now you are day dreaming about me Granger? This is a surprising development." It was the sound of his voice that indicated this was no dream. It sounded like it always did, cold, haunting, and ready to burn me.

I took a deep breath and prepared myself for the verbal lashing I knew accompanied that tone. "Not that it is any of your business Malfoy, but why would I dream about an insufferable git like you?"

It was like our meetings had never occurred. He sat there, calculating smirk plastered across his face as his eyes showed the thought he was placing into his retort. "I would rather be an insufferable git than a know-it-all little muggleborn." Whatever I planned on saying in return instantly vanished as the word I had been expecting never came. I looked at him, wondering what was happening when he spoke again. "I have orders to bring you to professor Snape's office. He would like to speak with you."

I rose without a word, wondering not only what Snape wanted but why Malfoy had not called me a Mudblood. Maybe our conversations had changed him and he was still the Draco I had known in our meetings. I followed him wordlessly toward the DADA classroom wondering what was going on; when we entered the Snape-less classroom I was more confused than ever.

I looked about; trying to deduce what was going on when he spoke. "There wasn't a more private way you could have returned my cloak to me or did you enjoy watching me be harassed by Pansy?"

I turned to look at him, unable to think. "Ummm… I thought we were meeting Snape." I instantly wanted to smack myself, here he was, the boy I had wanted to speak with since we parted yesterday and all I could say was 'where's Snape'?

He seemed a bit perplexed by my lack of understanding, understanding of what I wasn't sure. "Snape left this afternoon, we are free to speak here without interruption. Now, did you enjoy watching me squirm under Pansy's questions?"

I felt my heart leap at the answer. He had sought me out; he didn't want it to end. "No, I just saw it as the best option at the moment." I looked down at my feet, which had suddenly become fascinating. "After you left the night before I thought that was the end of our meetings."

"It was." I winced at his statement, though I wish I hadn't. I could feel him looking at me but I didn't want to meet his gaze. I felt stupid, I was so happy when I found he wanted to speak to me only to find out he just wanted to know why I had made such a big thing out of returning it. I shifted my weight as I continued to feel his eyes on me. I had the largest urge to leave at that moment. My cheeks were a bit flushed with the embarrassment I felt at my excitement and I did not want to be around when he realized it and mocked me for it.

I was about to run when I looked up to find him standing in front of me. I gasped in fright, not even noticing he had moved. He looked down at me with his haunting gray eyes and I felt my knees begin to grow weak. He moved his hand to my face, just as the night before, as he just stared right into my eyes. "I never planned on seeking you out again but last night, I couldn't sleep. I just kept thinking about you and everytime I thought of not speaking with you again it made me feel so uneasy, like I was making a mistake. And when my cloak came in the post I couldn't help but be a bit hurt…"

"I just didn't want to upset you! I really thought it was the best plan but then I thought about it all day and Parkinson was making such a fuss and I just felt so uneasy about giving it back to you and I thought that way no one would catch me giving it to you and it would just be easier and I felt like you didn't want to see me again even though..." I was cut off in my babbling when I felt his lips crash to mine.

It had been so long since I had felt his lips on mine and it felt more amazing than the first time. I stood there, his hands cupping my face and just kissed him as he kissed me. Soon my arms came back to life and wound themselves around his shoulders. I didn't know what we were doing, or where we would go from here but I was glad to be here.

Pansy looked around Draco's room annoyed. "How could he do this to me. I gave him EVERYTHING!" She tore his room apart looking for something to give her proof that Draco was with another woman. She spotted his bag on his desk chair and grabbed it. She threw the flap open and saw two folded pieces of colored parchment. She pulled them out and looked at the green one first, Shock overcoming her face as she read. "Draco, what are you doing?"

AUTHOR NOTE!!: Hello, PLEASE DON'T HURT ME!! I have two jobs now so free time is hard to find. Plus when I'm not working I am just not inspired to write cause work SUCKS MY SOUL AWAY!! But I was inspired by the story "Burning Hunger" by Vashka. It is just such a good story and really just inspired me to write which brought this chapter so good read her or his stuff cause it rocks my socks. Oh and PLEASE REVIEW!! Your reviews really inspire me. Please tell me what you think, your ideas about what should happen next cause I am always changing my ideas and your reviews really just give me the boost to write so please inspire me!! Also love to my wonderful beta's Ted and Stephanie!! I HOPED YOU ALL ENJOYED THE CHAPTER!!


	6. Chapter 6

I walked into the Slytherin common room; my mood higher than it had been in months

I walked into the Slytherin common room; my mood higher than it had been in months. Hermione could always do that to me. No matter what I always felt better when I left her. And kissing her today had been something I had missed since the first time it happened.

I smiled as I thought of what had happened after I kissed her. She was the first to pull back, refusing to meet my gaze. I had no idea what she was thinking but I was sure she had many things running through her mind. As for me, my mind was blank: all I could think about was how amazing she felt in my arms. I don't know what possessed me to make such a bold move as to approach her and steal her away. But at this moment that didn't matter, nothing mattered except that I was here, and I had kissed Hermione once again.

She was starting to fidget more, neither of us saying anything. I knew if I didn't make a move soon she would begin to regret what had just happened. I pulled her flush against me, loving the way her small frame melded with mine. She was breathing harder as she curled her hands towards her. She still refused to look at me, only staring into my chest.

I raised my hand toward her face, just wanting to remember what she felt like. I grazed my fingertips over her cheek causing her to inhale deeply. Slowly, my fingers began to descend as I ran them over her cheek, down to her jaw line and curving forward to her chin. I pulled her chin up, forcing her to meet my gaze.

Her brown eyes seemed alight with emotions as I just stared at her. She was truly radiant. Her tongue darted past her lips bringing my gaze to them. They glimmered from the renewed moisture her tongue brought. I remembered how sweet those lips had tasted just moments ago and needed another taste.

I bent down slightly, ready to take her lips when she rose suddenly and forced her lips to mine. I wasn't prepared for her boldness and it drew a moan from my throat. She tasted so sweet, like chocolate dipped strawberries. I opened my mouth and sent my tongue out to lap at her lips. My hands slithered up her arms toward that wild mass of hair that was becoming more endearing with each meeting. I could never imagine her without and never wanted to. I kept the pace slow, wanting to enjoy every second we had together.

Soon I felt her mouth open and her tongue tentatively brushed mine. I smirked as I moved to brush mine with hers. Soon our tongues were lapping at one another as our hands found other business to tend to. Her hands were no longer pooled in her chest; instead they were exploring my chest and neck, trying to figure out what to do. They moved up at down my chest, into my hair, and over my back. I was quickly becoming undone with the sensation her tiny hands were bringing me.

We were both panting when I decided to take our snog a bit further. I moved my hands down to her bum where I lifted her up, eliciting a squeak from her. Our kissing became harder as I moved her legs around my waist. Being the smart witch that she understood and took the initiative and wrapped them tightly around me, locking her ankles. I broke our kiss as I moved further down her neck. I moved, pushing her against the stone wall as she wrapped her hands back into my hair.

Her scent was intoxicating, flowery and completely seductive. I sucked on her collarbone as she wrapped her fingers in my hair, pulling slightly. Her hips bucked against mine as she moaned. I pulled away at that moment and looked at her. Before we had been caught up in the moment, trying not to think about what we were doing and whom we were doing it with. This time we both stared at one another, the pureblood and the mudblood, slytherin with Gryffindor, and knew exactly whom we were with and what we wanted to do.

When she moved her hand to cup my cheek I closed my eyes just enjoying the sensation it brought. Her soft hand moved up to cheek to my eyebrow and down my nose. When they reached my lips I pulled her finger into my mouth, sucking on it.

"Draco," she moaned breathy as I opened my eyes. She pulled her finger out of my mouth and moved both hands to cup my face. "I…"

A door slammed and we could hear a few students talking in the hall. She looked panicky over at the door and I knew our moment was coming to an end. I set her down slowly as I pulled back. She looked up at me and gave me a small smile. I returned it as I stepped back into her space and kissed her. "We'll meet again."

"Promise?" my heart shuttered at her whispered response as I nodded.

"I promise, Hermione." She left first as I stood there leaning against the wall.

I couldn't keep the silly grin off my face. I was on my way to my room to enjoy the memory even more when a voice called out from behind me. "Hello Draco." Simple, to the point, and in that yappy voice that had slowly been destroying my nerves.

I turned to look at Pansy. She sat in one of the large, leather backed chairs that lined the common room. She seemed, different. She wore her usual outfit, designer slacks with a never buttoned up blouse; yet, her aura seemed cocky. As if she knew something that would one up whomever was so unlucky as to have their a secret discovered. I knew, the instant she flashed me her all too rehearsed smile that I was that unlucky soul. Instantly my heart sank.

"You missed your afternoon classes," she continued as she sat coolly in her chair, one leg swung on an arm, "It is never like you to skip a lesson, is everything alright?"

She was watching me, gauging my reaction as I stood in the middle of the room. I steadied my look, giving her my best nonchalant Malfoy gaze. If she wanted to play this game then I would play if better. "Of course Pansy, everything is fine. Did I miss much?"

I tossed my hook out and slowly watched her. She didn't react, her eyes piercing mine. Whatever she knew was big, for Pansy never held so much confidence in our game. If it were something small she would twitch her foot. Something of minimal importance would cause her to smirk. Yet when it was big, she knew she had all the cards and would find no reason to react. That caused me even greater worry.

She looked down at her nails, trying to portray the picture of boredom as she responded. "Oh nothing that out of the ordinary. Slugghorn taught us about some ruddy old potion, Binns rambled on about the ogre wars." She paused and returned her gaze back to me. Here it came, a hint to what she knew. A glimpse into what had caused her to be so cocky. "Oh yes, and stupid Mudblood Granger missed lessons too. Very curious, isn't it, Draco."

All the blood drained from my face. I knew my composure slipped for just a moment because she pounced on it, rising from her chair. She sauntered over to me and placed her hand on my chest. "Strange, isn't it, that she would miss class when she seems to live for them. And then you go missing as well. If people didn't know you any better they might come to think that something might be happening between you two." She looked up into my eyes, her face giving off a smirk of victory.

My worst nightmare had materialized before my very eyes. She knew, how she had come to find out I don't know but I just knew that she knew about Hermione and I. On the outside I worked to keep my composure intact but on the inside I was frantic. I had to defuse this, get her away from the notion before it could manifest into something bigger.

I scoffed and gave her a disgusted look. "Me and the Mudblood. Come now Pansy, why would I lower myself to something as vile as a Mudblood. Especially Potties little know it all."

It hadn't worked; she seemed to predict my answer as she walked around me, her hand trailing along my back. "I wondered the same thing. But thankfully these gave me wonderful insight." And there, right in front of my face was the green and red notes I had exchanged with Hermione. Dread seemed to sink into every pore as she finished her walk around me. As she stood before me, evidence of my treachery in hand, I knew there would be no walking away from this unscathed. She tilted her head, her smug attitude quickly being replaced by rage as she held the notes between two fingers. "Care to explain?"

I glared down at her, knowing it would be a fight to make this disappear. I had to think of what to say. Every word from this moment on had to be carefully planned. One slip and I knew both Hermione and I would find ourselves in great danger. "Come now Pansy, do you honestly think I would willingly involve myself with filth?"

She all but snarled at me as her pug nose rose higher in the air. "A few months ago, no, but since the Dark Lord gave you your mission you have been changing. And then I find these." She shoved the colored pieces of parchment in my face. "What do you think you are doing, Draco? What could you possibly be thinking? Consorting with a Mudblood. Are you going to turn into a blood traitor on me? You going to turn your back on your family and friends?"

I grabbed her shoulders and pushed her into a wall. I had to get her scared, so scared that she would drop this. It was my only hope, I knew that simple sweet talk wouldn't make her let up on this. "Don't call me a blood traitor, you hear me?" I took her and slammed her into the wall again. She let out a little yelp but I held my hands tight on her arms. "Don't you Ever insult me like that again."

She didn't meet my gaze; instead she looked down at my hands that I knew would leave marks. But I had to get my point across; I had to make sure she thought I hadn't changed. I needed her to believe I was still the ruthless pureblood my father had raised me to be. "But why are you talking to her Draco? I just want to understand please."

I felt bad; I didn't want to hurt Pansy. Yes she annoyed me but in the end she was still close to me. I had cared for her once and to hear her beg was something that was hard to take. It made me feel like my father, like I was back in the manor watching my father put my mother in her place. I didn't want to do this and I knew if Hermione knew what I was doing she would never speak with me again. But I had to; I had to make sure that this moment left a lasting memory in Pansy's mind, otherwise it would be the end for Hermione and I.

I grabbed Pansy's face and forced it up so that I could look in her eyes. She kept them downcast, playing the perfect role of a submissive pureblood female. It broke me to see it, and it made me think of Hermione. It was one of the things I liked about her, I knew she would never let anyone treat her the way I was treating Pansy. I took and deep breath and pushed those thoughts of Hermione away. I had to stay strong, angry, and above all else, I had to play the perfect pureblood male.

"Look at me." I growled as I waited for her to respond. She didn't though I had truly hoped she would. "I said Look At Me!" I yelled at her as I shook her head, slightly banging it into the wall. She whined in fear as she looked up into my eyes.

I couldn't keep my composure. Seeing the way she looked at me, I should have just let her stare down. I could see everything through her eyes. The fear, the hurt at the thought that I might be with someone else, and the most disturbing and heart wrenching of all, the love she still had for me. My voice lost some of its anger as I spoke. "I am only talking to the Mudblood so that I might complete my mission. The Dark Lord wants Dumbledore dead and who better to use then someone that both Dumbledore and the stupid boy who wont die trust. If I can make her fall for me, I can use her to help me get close to them. I can get information and then when Dumbledore finally trusts me I can complete my mission. You see, I'm not doing this out of some sick want to actually be near a mudblood, I'm doing it for the greater good."

I could feel her accept the answer and calm a bit since my voice had lost all of its anger toward the end. I released her face and she moved into my arms, holding me tightly. "I'm sorry Draco. I should have known you had a plan. I was just so jealous, I couldn't help it. And then to find out that Granger had your cloak, it was just too much for me. I won't doubt you again, I promise."

I held Pansy as she snuggled into my chest. I let go a sigh of relief that it had passed. I would have to be more careful. Now Pansy would be more watchful than ever. It would be harder and harder to sneak away to see Hermione now that Pansy had suspicion. But I knew today's act had all but averted any big problem. I knew this would stop with her. I pulled back and gave her my Malfoy smirk. "Now, there will be no more of this blood traitor business, right?" Pansy nodded as I leaned forward to give her a kiss on the forehead. I moved out of her arms and put my arms gently on her shoulder. "Now I will see you at dinner, I am going to go get washed up." With that I walked away, feeling confident that there wouldn't be a problem from Pansy again.

Pansy watched as Draco walked away, rubbing her sore arms. "Do you believe him?" She turned to see Zabini walk out of the dark alcove he had been hiding in.

Pansy looked over to the door that Draco had just exited through. "No, I don't. We'll have to keep a close eye on him."

Author Note: OH NO!! WHAT DOES THIS MEAN FOR OUR WONDERFUL COUPLE!! WHAT WILL BLAISE AND PANSY DO!? WILL DRACO AND HERMIONE EVER GET THE CHANCE TO JUST ENJOY THEIR BLOOMING RELATIONSHIP!? FIND OUT SOON IN PASSING NOTES 7!! Also please review!! We Author's so love reviews, ESPEICALLY me!! PEACE AND LOVE TO MY BETAS!!


	7. Chapter 7

It had been a week since I had spoken to Draco

It had been a week since I had spoken to Draco. Not a word had come from him, not a note, an owl, nothing. It was as if I had never existed to him, if everything we had done never happened. We reverted to the status we were in our first year, opposite sides of a spectrum, bickering with one another and wishing it would go away. To say I was heartbroken would be a statement that in no way could capture the extent of all the emotions I held within my heart.

To the world nothing was wrong. I still helped Ron and Harry with their work, even though since Harry had the Half-Blood Prince to help him he didn't need me. I went to meals but didn't eat much. I still got perfect scores, did my duty and looked completely normal. But inside I felt as hollow and empty as the cup we were transfiguring into a sword.

I looked next to me to see Ron had managed to make his cup into a butter knife and Harry a steak knife. Both looked troubled by their inability to complete the project. I returned my gaze to my cup, which I had yet to attempt to change. I didn't wish to change it, it seemed fitting to me. An empty goblet had the ability to be filled but without the help of another it just sat there, empty.

Who was I to change it from its original form? Sure it would be of better use, as a sword if I were to meet a gaggle of death eaters in a dark alleyway but it was still useful as a goblet. But even if I were behind the reason of its change in essence it is still an empty, hollow, loathsome little goblet. Maybe if I were the reason the goblet changed it didn't really change, it just took on the form that best suited me. Maybe it had changed because it knew to get closer to me it needed to change so it transfigured itself into a sword and let me use it for a bit then when I had forgotten it was a goblet it reverted back and I am just at a loss because I became so used to the sword.

"Hermione?" I looked up at Harry who had a very worried expression on his face. I then noticed how quiet the class had become and slowly my eyes drifted from my friends face over to my peers who seemed to all be staring at me. That's when I looked down and saw that my goblet was no longer on my desk but rather fallen to the floor.

"Mrs. Granger, is there a reason behind you interrupting my class?" I looked at Professor McGonagall and then back at my goblet.

I didn't know what had happened but apparently it was something loud and disruptive. "No Professor. I'm sorry."

She seemed to be just as confused as I was about the situation as she shook her head and sighed. "Ten points from Gryffindor. Next time keep your remarks about the assignment to yourself."

That caught my ear as I looked at her. What had I said? As the class went back to its busy work I had no need to ask as Ron informed me of my actions.

"What the bloody hell is wrong with you Hermione? Hitting the cup goblet off the table and yelling at it? Have you lost your marbles?"

I could feel my cheeks warming as I looked down at my hands. My frustration must have exploded while lost in thoughts of Draco. I looked up and saw Harry giving me his most concerned look. It was embarrassing, especially since he was seated but two rows behind me. And Merlin only knew what I said.

"What's wrong Hermione?" It was Harry again. I didn't want to talk about it. The last thing I needed was to feel guilt for hiding things from my friends. But I already felt guilt for that didn't I? I had kept something from the two people I swore to be honest with. I had left them behind to live an alternate life. And I had looked forward to seeing what that life could bring with it. I had waited to venture into that alternate world and leave the two most important people behind. It was for the best, our silence was for the best.

I shook my head and saw that McGonagall had placed another goblet on my desk. With a flick of my wrist it became a sword and my resolve was set. I would never know the sword again, all that was left was the goblet I had grown to know and it was for the best. Though the sword was intriguing and wonderful while it lasted, it couldn't continue. Because a goblet is always a goblet, no matter how you transfigure it.

Class ended fairly quickly after I had completed the assignment. Harry had managed to create a dagger and Ron; well his butter knife was the best butter knife I had seen in some time. When the bell had sounded signaling the end I had packed my things rather quickly. It was the last class before the weekend and I just wanted to go to my room, gather myself in my blankets and read a good book. I did not, however, get that.

As I was trying to swim through the mass of people a hand gripped my wrist. I turned to yell at the Harry and tell him I was fine when grey eyes meet me. My words caught on my tongue and all I could do was turn and hope that he would leave me be. That hope came true but with a price. As his hand slid past mine I felt a small piece of paper drop into my palm. A note, something I had been craving from him since we parted after our kiss but now wished would evaporate.

As he walked past me I heard him turn and snarl, "Watch where your going mudblood." I preferred the week of silence for I was not prepared for the wave of emotions that exploded in my chest. Beyond what the note said he had called me the name in which I dreaded. Sticks and stones were nothing compared to the hurtful words throw at you by one you hold feelings for.

And that's what I had, feelings. I wouldn't call it love. Lust most assuredly, but love was too large of an emotion to feel for someone who you only truly spoke to in written word. And that's what I held in my hand, the written words of the boy I had a strong liking to. Yes liking. Though it sounded juvenile it was the best way to describe my level of emotion. Or at least the level of emotion I was trying to make myself feel. Like, a simple schoolyard crush that came and went as quickly as a summer breeze on a humid day. Something that would not affect me and allow me to move on with my days. But it was not that, no matter how much I wished it so. I had allowed him into my heart just a bit and once there he dug deeper, gouge himself in and not allowing me to release him without more pain and time.

I shook my head. I was too lost in thought and I had things to do. Like escaping Harry and Ron before they could question me more about my outburst. I had stood there, in the middle of the hallway, ignoring everyone around me; until I took a step forward and had stepped in a pile of mud, peeves laughing whole heartedly.

I weaved around people, trying to ignore the constant squish that met my ears as my mud laden shoes hit the floor in my rush to make it to my room. I could hear Harry and Ron trying to catch up but I was too quick for them. I wanted my room, I need my room, and I didn't need my boys delaying that. People would point and laugh at the trail of mud I left behind but I didn't care, I had my goal and I would plow forward no matter the obstacle presented before me. So it was no surprise that when I approached the fat lady she all but swing off the hinges to get out of my way. She had no idea how wise that move was, even if she was opening for someone that was coming through on the other side. I like to believe she would have opened for me even without the patil twins exiting.

With a few quick hellos, a sprint up some stairs and a quick kick to get my shoes off and I was there, safe and sound on my bed. I pulled my sticky socks off and threw them onto the ground near my shoes. I would have to wash up but at the moment I just wanted to lay down and enjoy my peace. I sighed and moved my hands to my face to rub it when I noticed the note. In my rush to get away from everyone I must have forgotten he had given it to me.

I stared at the note, twisting it in my fingers. I shouldn't even read it. After the way he has been treating me this past week, the sneers I get from him and his little pets, I should just throw it away. I crushed the note in my hand and threw it toward my discarded shoes.

Since the day we had our, snog, he had been nothing but the old, obnoxious, horrible goblet I had dealt with since entering this school. That night at dinner I had noticed a change. Pansy seemed to be on him more than usual and staring at me quite a bit. I had heard that a few people saw us leaving together but no one suspected that we had done anything. Some people were surprised that Draco had actually gotten me for the nasty Defense Against the Dark Arts teacher but no one thought that Draco and I had done what we actually did.

And someone else seemed to be around Draco more. I had only heard of him when Harry had told us about what had happened at the beginning of the year and had yet to really hear him speak myself. A very quiet boy named Blaise Zabini. Though I didn't know much about him I knew he was a Slytherin and a friend of the goblet formally known as sword Draco. Wherever Draco went he seemed to be right behind him.

That thought made me look at the note. Maybe something had happened that night that he never had a chance to tell me because of his newly acquired watchdog. I sat up quickly on my bed. MAYBE THEY FOUND OUT! I turned, practically falling off the bed and snatched up the note on the floor when Lavender walked in the room.

"Hello Hermione," she looked at me, on my hands and knees, hovering over my muddy shoes and socks, "Everything alright?"

I flushed as I noticed my weird posture. "Yes, everything is fine. Just dropped something." I waved the note and stood, dusting myself off.

Lavender, thankfully, must not have been in a prying mood as she shrugged, gave me a final weird glance and moved over to her side of the room. "Are you excited to go to hogsmead tomorrow?"

I looked at her and stopped patting the non-existent dust from my legs. I had forgotten about the hogsmead weekend. I shook my head and started for my bed. "Yeah, very."

Lavender turned away from me and pulled her school blouse off. "Ron sure looks good."

I rolled my eyes. Once upon a time I had liked Ron. During fourth year I would have given anything for Ron to notice me but now that affection had turned to one of simple brotherly love. Maybe after the war if we don't find anyone to our liking we may get together but I am not going to actively pursue a relationship with him. But apparently his growing over the summer had caught the eye of Lavender.

I sat on my bed and relaxed, toying with the note again. "I guess. He seems the same to me."

Lavender looked over her shoulder at me as she pulled on her house pants. "Do you like Ron?"

I shook my head. "Not in the way you are thinking. He is just a friend."

Lavender seemed to perk up at that thought. "Really? So he is up for grabs. I mean, everyone thinks you two are, you know, and I don't want to make a move if you're, you know."

I stopped twirling my note and just stared at her. Sometimes I was surprised that someone so smart could sound so dumb. "He is all yours, feel free."

With my approval she smiled, slipped on a tight little top and walked out of the room, probably off to find her new prey. Poor Ron, he had no idea what was after him. With the room vacant once again I unfolded the note.

At first the page was blank but when I brushed my fingers across the page letters rose upon the paper. His elegant script was more comforting than I wished to admit.

'I wish to keep our promise, meet me at the lake.'

I ran my fingers all over the page to see if anything else would come up, an explanation, an apology, ANYTHING, but that was it. I sighed, my curiosity beginning to take over as I decided to change into different clothes. I didn't know how long I had been in my room but from the rise in noise dinner must be close to over. I didn't know what time I was supposed to meet Mr. talkative at the lake but I figured it to be around this time, since all of his wardens would be distracted with other things.

I pulled a jacket on and quickly ran down the steps. I stopped at the bottom and leaned over to see who was in the common room. Cormac sat in the large chair by the fire talking to Lavender. Lavender continued to send looks across the room where I found Harry reading his potions book, more like what the Half-Blood Prince had to say, and Ron playing a game of wizard chess with Ginny.

I didn't know how I was supposed to get out without anyone noticing me. I leaned back against the stair wall and tried to think of a way to get by. When I heard Lavender go over a greet Ron I knew that was my queue. As quick as my legs would take me I ran out of the room, down the stairs and was outside of Hogwarts grand entrance before you could say lemon drops.

The sun was setting and I knew curfew would start soon. Though I was curious to see what Draco wanted I didn't want to get in trouble. I walked around the lake, not really knowing where to go. This was so dumb, why did I even bother. I had no idea where I was supposed to go, at what time, and why after a week of treating me like a lowly mudblood was he seeking me out no…

"I'm glad you came." I screamed and turned toward the voice. Draco threw his hands up, trying to show he meant no harm to me. "I'm sorry, I didn't mean to scare you."

"Sure you didn't." I turned from him and began walking again. Seeing him, the Draco I had come to know again, was harder than I thought it would be. "Why did you ask me to come here?" I wanted to get this over with. I didn't want to take the chance of him turning his charm on and me losing my anger.

He sighed; probably sensing I was not pleased with this meeting. "I'm sorry we haven't spoken in a while. I've had a lot to do." His voice seemed a bit nervous. I stopped walking and turned my head to look at him over my shoulder.

He wasn't looking at me but out at the lake. The setting sun had cast a red and orange hue across the water making seem as if there were two setting skies. He looked pensive and far away, as if he wasn't here at the moment. I turned to face the lake as well and folded my arms. "We have spoken, just not in this way."

I could tell by the straightening of his spine that he understood what I meant. "I am sorry about that too. I've had my actions come under question."

I felt my heart skip a beat. "Does someone know, about us?" I was so scared for the answer. What if Harry and Ron found out? What if the school found out? Everything could come falling apart in an instance. My world could tumble down and everything would be ruined.

He nodded his head and still refused to look at me. "Pansy found our notes, I forgot to get rid of them when we were done. I think she may have told Blaise too. He has been watching me more, never leaving me alone. But I told them I am just using you…." He cut himself off and became pensive again.

I looked at him, trying to figure out everything. "Using me for what?"

He became stiffer as he took a deep breath. "That's not important."

I could feel my brows gather as I looked at him. "What are you using me for Draco?" He shifted his weight, whatever he had told them he didn't want me to know. He kicked a rock as he focused on the ground before him. I had never seen him like this, so nervous and anxious. Now that I had a chance to look at him more he seemed different all together. His skin was paler, he had horribly dark circles under his eyes and he looked thinner than I last remember. "Draco what's wrong?"

He just shook his head. "It's nothing. Don't worry about it I have it under control. I just wanted to see you again." He finally looked at me. His eyes gave everything away. They looked glossy, as if he hadn't gotten sleep in the last week. His cheekbones seemed more predominant and he looked so sad.

"Draco, please, tell me what's wrong." My anger forgotten I walked up to him and cupped his face. He seemed to grow a little livelier from my touch as he just looked at me.

He moved his hands to grasp mine and pulled them from his face. "I just have a lot on my mind is all. I'm sorry." He leaned down and gave me a quick kiss on the lips. As he began to pull back I pushed up on my toes and forced his mouth to meet mine again. I titled my head so I could become closer to him. Our lips slowly moved against one another just enjoying the soft feel of the contact. The last kiss we had shared was fiery and lustful. This one was different. It was slow, methodical, and more passionate than any kiss we had shared before.

After a bit we pulled back and looked at each other. A smile slowly grew on my face as a smirk moved to grace his. We decided to sit by the lake and just talk. It was nice, speaking about Slugghorn parties that Draco admitted to being jealous about not receiving an invitation to. We talked about class, and how we had been since we last spoke. When I brought up Lavender and her comment about the upcoming hogsmead weekend his entire demeanor changed. He tightened his hold around my waist and became stiff once again.

"Would you not go to hogsmead if I asked you too?"

I looked over at him and tilted my head. "Why would you ask me not to go to hogsmead?"

He didn't look at me instead he looked back out onto the lake once again. "Would you?"

I sighed as I turned away from him and followed his gaze to the now dark lake. "No. I probably wouldn't, unless you had a very good reason. Is there something you want to ask me?"

He didn't respond for a moment, didn't even blink. He just starred forward and until he took a deep breath. "No, I guess there isn't."

I leaned against his chest and looked up at his face. I had been trying to forget about the way he had been acting earlier but with this new wave of vagueness I couldn't ignore it anymore. "Draco, what's going on? What is it that you think you can't tell me?"

He looked down at me and again I was hit with how strained he looked. It seemed that the goblet had faded and instead of the shiny sword I had at the beginning it was replaced with a beaten and rusted one. He moved a hand to my cheek and gave me a kiss on my forehead. "What are you to me Hermione?"

His tactic to change subjects annoyed me yet he moved it to a topic I also had many questions about. "I don't know Draco, what am I to you?"

He gave me a smirk and kissed my cheek. "I don't know, but I think you are becoming someone very important."

I closed my eyes at his kiss and smiled at his response. When I felt his lips once again touch mine I forgot about all the questions I had for him, all the things I wanted to know. All I needed to know was that I was becoming someone special to him as he was becoming to me. We sat by the lake a bit longer until I felt we could not stay any longer. We walked back into entrance room and before we parted ways he leaned in and kissed my cheek, whispering. "Be careful." And with that he was off toward his dungeons leaving me as confused as before.

Author Note: I'M SORRY IT TOOK ME SO LONG!! PLEASE DON'T HATE ME!! So I have been having a pretty rough week but I thought I should get this out to you. I will try and be more speedy about my updating but it is hard when you have a stressful life. OH and to spice up my motivation to write I am having a vote. What would you like to see in the next chapter, which will be a Draco POV. A) A fight with Hermione. B) A meeting between father and son C) a hot and steamy lemon or D) all of the above. PLEASE REVIEW AND LET ME KNOW!! I have ideas for all of them but it is up to you to see which one makes it in the next chapter!! Love to you all and my OUTRAGIOUSLY AWESOME betas. Till next time!!

My beta Ted's Vote: I think they should have a fight WHILE they do it, and then AS they climax, Lucious should burst in on them!!


	8. Chapter 8

Author Note: First I would like to apologize for the horridly long delay in posting, I have had a very busy time with moving in

Author Note: First I would like to apologize for the horridly long delay in posting, I have had a very busy time with moving into my new apartment, starting school again and working a new shit job that I hate more than my old one. This chapter IS the one you voted on so be looking out for that. Again I'm sorry and I will try and keep up with posting once again. THANK YOU!! Amy.

!!WARNING!! This chapter, thanks to the vote, contains a very descriptive lemon! If that is not your thing, skip down about four pages then begin reading. A line of will mark the "Safe zone" where you can start reading again. ENJOY!!

The room was dark when I entered it, the moonlight my only aid. I looked around while loosening my tie, making sure nothing was out of place. I could see all the papers I had left on my desk were stacked and sorted into tiny piles. That made me smile. I threw my tie on the stacks and looked to the bed as if to find the reason behind my now tidy desk where a large lump laid in the middle of it. The plush green comforter made up most of the bulk as a large mass of curls made up the rest. I knew that returning late would leave me alone when I arrived, but I had some hope that perhaps she had stayed awake to greet me.

Her day must have been just as long as mine since the dipping of the bed as I sat on it did not disturb her. I chuckled a bit; she was an unusually light sleeper, which had caused us to buy a lush and expensive mattress. The salesmen claimed it would prevent her from ever feeling me enter or leave the bed. He misjudged her sensitivity and she still complained of the swaying. For her not to moan and bat me on the arm meant that she was out for the night and I would be out a welcome home kiss.

I shucked off my shoes and socks and rose, walking to our bathroom. I went through the usual motions of readying for bed, trying to be as silent as physically able. Though I had gained some bulk since my seeker days, I was anything but large. However, when I tried to be stealthy I only succeeded in sounding like a bull in a china shop. I rushed and was trying to get into bed and not disturb her when I noticed her large brown eyes staring at me.

"I didn't mean to wake you." I whispered to her, just in cause she was still trapped in her dreams.

She smiled a tired grin at me and rubbed her face a bit into the pillow, "I know." Her voice was a bit deeper from her slumber and only made her seem more beautiful.

I took her conscious state as an opportunity to move into the bed and become comfortable under the covers. I touched her arm, testing to see if she had fallen asleep again only to have her pull my arm under her as she lay on her stomach. I smiled at her as I pulled her close to me.

"Enjoying it while you can?" I asked as I tried to smooth her wild mane back and kiss her forehead.

I heard her sigh before she pulled my forearm up to her mouth and kissed it. "You laugh but you know how much I love sleeping on my stomach, it's hard not doing it for months."

I pulled her tighter at the reference of our newly discovered child. It had only been a week since we found out we were pregnant but I was already overjoyed. The idea of my child growing inside of her always made me swell with joy. I moved my hand down to her still flat stomach and imagined what it would be like in the months to come. That only made me want to pull her closer and kiss her, which is exactly what I did.

I turned her so she was facing me and cupped her face in my palms. Her hands flattened against my chest as she weaved her legs with mine. I could never explain the lust I held for her, not from the moment it first emerged to the present. It was always unchecked, powerful and controlling. It was the reason behind my break from my family to my turning to help the people I once considered enemies. As long as I could hold her in my arms she held all control over me and she was always happy to exploit it.

She rolled me on my back and used our entwined legs to steady her atop. Her hands had moved from my chest down to my belly button where she flicked and played with it for a moment. She always thought it fun to play with my belly button though I will never understand why. Something about it being so cute, though the appeal behind a belly button is lost to me.

I moved my hands from her face to her soft yet untamable hair. A focus of my profound tormenting it was now my favorite trait, distinctly her. No matter where we went I could always pick her out of a crowd and I adored it. I wrapped my fingers in the curls and gave a light tug eliciting a moan from past her lips in the process. She kissed me harder, pushing her lips fiercely to mine and finally leaving my button alone to play with my nipples. That forced a moan from me. She knew just where to go and what to do to get those.

She broke our kiss and planted small licks and kisses trailing down my neck to my shoulders. Both hands now toyed with both my nipples and I left one hand stuck in her hair and the other to enjoy her body. She had such a body. Tight and firm, she had beautifully engorged breasts from the pregnancy that had only become more sensitive than before. I couldn't help but exploit that factor by gently flicking her already perked nipple. She gasped loudly and arched toward me. Her ministrations seemed to be derailed for the time being as she focused on what I was doing. I pulled her up a bit more on my body so that her breasts were closer to my face.

I moved one hand to her hip to steady her and the other one pulled gently on her nipple. She bucked and groaned as her head was thrown back. I continued to switch from soft swipes to semi-hard tugs. Too hard and she would scold me for being rough, though she would enjoy it no matter. I looked at her face to see her watching me before I leaned forward and took one of her nipples in my mouth. Instantly her hand was behind my head forcing me harder against her breast. I licked and batted it with my mouth as she continued to squirm in my arms. I flicked my tongue quickly back and forth as I stopped randomly and sucked her.

She was panting, seeming too becoming unglued when I felt her tug on my hair pulling me away from her breast and to her awaiting mouth. She was ardent in the way she forced me to kiss her. It wasn't long until she broke our kiss once more and moved down, this time leading to my own nipples.

It was my turn to become unglued as she licked and batted and sucked. As she sucked one nipple into her mouth she would use her other hand to pulled and pinch the other making my cock jump. When she bit me softly I couldn't help but groan as I could feel the pre-cum starting to spill from my tip. She was straddling my leg now and I could feel her juices starting to drip onto my leg. She was so wet.

I couldn't ignore it, I flipped us so I was on top and kissed again as I repositioned her legs. I cupped my legs under her knees and pushed them up so she was spread and open to me. I tried to get the tip in the right spot without using my hand but my impatience got the better of me and I grabbed my cock and moved it to her opening. She was sopping wet as I started to enter her and we both moaned in unison as I slipped quickly inside.

She seemed to be molded to fit me perfectly, still so tight. I started slow; making sure my dick was lubricated enough before I began to go faster. I bent my head down and took a nipple into my mouth as I moved her legs father apart to get deeper. She was howling, scratching my back, demanding I go deeper. I obeyed. I always obeyed and she seemed to get ever louder. I could hear the bed moaning as well as it seemed to rock with us. I toyed with her breasts constantly moving from one nipple to the other, making sure both were well looked after.

I could tell she was getting close as she started to hold her breath, releasing it with a groan. At some point she had forced me away, moving so that she could suck and kiss my neck. As she got closer she began to bite down causing me to all but scream from the pleasure-pain combo. I could feel my balls tightening as I, too, was coming close. The feel of her slick pussy and her breasts bouncing with my thrusts, to her biting and scratching me was so overwhelming me. When she began to shiver in my arms from her orgasm I released with her, spilling everything I had inside of her.

Neither of us moved as we tried to regain our breaths. I smoothed her hair whispering to her how incredible she is. I moved to kiss her when I heard our bedroom door open.

"Mommy, Daddy, I no sleep." I rolled off of Hermione as I tried to gain my composure in the presence of my eldest son.

"What's wrong Scorpius?" It was Hermione who seemed to gain her composure first and was trying to remain discreet in her lack of dress.

"Bad Dweems". I smiled at what everyone called the clone of me as he wobbled over to our bed, hoping for an invite in. I sat up, knowing that me being naked from the waist down was not unusual and picked him up.

"It's ok son, it was only a dream."

I sat up in bed sweating and panting. _What the hell?_ I looked around, making sure that I was once again back in my dorm room and not in the one I shared in my dream.

"It was only a dream." I whispered to myself as I fell back onto my pillows. That line bringing a strange sense of deja vu as the dream began to fade from memory. I looked around the dorm as I tried to gain my composure once again.

I looked out the window and saw that it was still dark. It was either late evening or very early morning: either way I knew I would not be returning to sleep tonight. The task He–Who-Should-Not-Be-Named had given me had been taking its toll. How he expected me to actually kill Dumbledore was beyond my understanding. Though the wizard was batty, he seemed invincible. He was smart, though I would love denying it, he was and I just had no idea what to do to get to him.

I moved out of bed, rearranging my boxers back into place, and walked to the trunk at the end of my bed. I looked around to make sure everyone was asleep before I dug in and pulled out a small box. Inside was the coin I would need to contact Rosmerta to tell her to give the necklace away.

"What are you looking at Malfoy?" I turned to see Zabini sitting up in his bed. He had his head cocked to the side and seemed to have a knowing look.

I put it back in my trunk and closed the top; I should have checked better to make sure everyone was asleep. The last thing I needed was for Zabini to be breathing down my neck even harder. I didn't know where his loyalties laid and even if I did I still didn't need him in my business. I stood and moved to get back in my bed.

"Not in a sharing mood?" I pulled my comforter back and sat on the edge of my bed.

"No." I pulled my legs off the floor and quickly tucked them into the warmth of my sheets.

I could hear him chuckle before his own sheets rustled and stilled. I lay there, trying to will myself to sleep but it was no good. All I could think about was the hogsmead trip later in the day and how Hermione would be going.

I wish I could tell her, keep her away from the danger I was causing, but to do so would jeopardize everything. Our, connection, was fragile to say the least and to test it so soon with such a large secret would be too much. I just knew the second I told of my alignment with He-Who-Should-Not-Be-Named she would run off to Pothead and Weaselby and never speak to me again.

I scoffed, maybe I should tell her. Keep her away for good. But keeping her away had only distracted me more, made my nights worse. The week I went without her had been harder than I could have imagined. The pressure I felt plus the energy it took to keep up my superior façade was unbearable. These days I did not feel so mighty. I felt just as what I knew I was: a trapped slave, a pawn in a plan that held nothing good for me, only a life of blind servitude to a mad half-blood.

Oh the irony of it! Many thought Him to be a great pureblood but I had heard my father and Goyle Sr. talking one night and knew the truth. He was nothing but a mad mudblood. And my father followed even when faced with the truth. All my life I had been taught how lowly they were to me, how pathetic, yet here we were, following one. I know my father saw him as a means to an end, as a way to get all the vermin out of the wizarding world but we are Malfoy's. We are supposed to be the top of all pureblood families. I could never understand how we, the epitome of what a perfect pureblood family should be, would be bowing down to a master.

Yet, I knew he was the ticket to our power and as long as he held the ticket firm in his scaly hand he would hold our lives, my life. I did what was best for me, what would keep me safe, and following him was the only way to do it. Dumbledore couldn't save me like his precious Potter.

I somehow fell asleep again; I didn't know it until I was once again caught in a dream.

I was standing in an empty classroom, Hermione in my arms. In a mere matter of hours I would go to the room of requirement and let the death eaters in. I tried to convince her to leave but her stupid Gryffindor courage kept her rooted in place, demanding answers to questions I couldn't respond too. She wanted to know what I was doing and even faced with it, knowing that I would have to kill one of the men she revered I could not have her hate me. Yet I knew that after this night she would, there was no way around it.

I pushed her toward the door, trying to be as stern as possible. "Stop being so fucking selfless and GO!"

Her cheeks were aflame with anger. Her hair was a bit tussled and her breath was jagged. "No, I will go nowhere until you explain to me what is going on. And don't you DARE say to me that you can't tell me because I will not hear it. Why do you want me to leave?"

I clenched my fists, hating her stupid pride. "Because it is no longer safe at Hogwarts."

"Why?"

"Because it's not." My teeth joined my fists and remained tight. I could feel myself slipping, my anger clouding my better judgment.

"Why isn't it Draco?!"

I couldn't take it; I pushed her roughly against the wall. "Because in an hour I am going to be letting death eaters into Hogwarts!"

Her face instantly fell. She looked horrified, disgusted even. I had expected that response but it hurt just the same to see it. She shook her head, pushing me away. "No," She started hitting my chest. "No", she started kicking and smacking me. "It can't be!"

I grabbed her arms and made her look at me, trying to stop her hysterics. "It's true and I will, no matter what you say. In one hours' time Hogwarts will be flooded with Death Eaters and there will be nothing I can do to protect you."

She started fighting against my hold, trying to break free of my grasp but I wouldn't let her. Tears had started to slide down her face. "Why! Why are you doing this!? I thought you changed!?"

She was sobbing now and trying desperately to hit me again. I didn't feel anything. I knew this would happen, I had expected it I just didn't want it. Yet here it was and there was no going back. I was faced with two choices. I could say soothing words, try and calm her and tell her I had changed, tell her I loved her, or..

"Why would I ever change for a Mubblood like you?" I spat at her and threw her to the ground. She stayed there a moment, not moving or attempting to rise. When she did finally move she turned on me so swiftly I had no chance to prepared and

BAM!

There was laughter and an agitated grumble as I was pulled from my dream, once again having Hermione at its core. I looked to find Crabbe on the floor, his sheets wrapped around his large girth. Goyle was stumbling to try and help untangle him as Zabini just laughed at the two.

"Merlin, Crabbe I thought you were at LEAST smart enough to get out of bed right!" Zabini jibbed as he rose from his own bed and stretched, still chuckling at the scene on the floor. Zabini then looked over at me and smirked before walking to the bathroom to get ready for the day.

I rubbed my face and groaned, it was the day of the hogsmead trip and I was not looking forward to it. I flung my covers back and moved to the side of the bed looking for my house shoes. I glanced over at my trunk then around the room again. Crabbe had been untangled and followed Goyle in the bathroom as Zabini seemed to be nowhere in sight.

As everyone got ready for the trip I got ready for my detention with McGonagall. Ruddy old witch, keeping me here because I wasn't doing my homework. I just couldn't concentrate with all that was going on. I knew that today Madam Rosmerta would be using the imperious curse to have someone bring the necklace up to Hogwarts but I was a bit sick with worry. Not because I didn't think it would go to plan but because I knew Hermione was going on the Hogsmead trip and had a chance of being the one to get the package.

I walked over to my trunk and lifted the lid, quickly pulling out the coin I would need today. I picked out a slate grey waffle cuff sweater and slick black cotton trousers to wear under my cloak since I was not required to wear the school robes. I walked into the bathroom with the others, slipping the coin into my trouser pocket so they would not see it.

After quickly getting dressed and gathering what I thought I would need for detention today, I went down to breakfast. Everyone was in the Great Hall talking excitedly about what they wished to do on today's trip. I rolled my eyes and tried to ignore it all as I walked over to my house table.

The second I was near the Slytherin table I felt something attach itself to my arm. Without even looking down I knew it was my personal leech named Pansy. Her shrill voice only confirmed that thought. "Hi Drake, you're looking amazing today." I could feel her hand on my chest, rubbing the wool of my sweater. "You know how I love when you wear grey, it really brings out your eyes."

As usual, I let the comment pass and sat down next to Crabbe and Goyle who seemed to be on their eleventh helping. Blaise was staring at them with a look of utter disgust on his face. "Could you both eat like the pure bloods you are at least once in your life?" I heard him say as I placed some eggs on my plate.

Blaise's comment was rewarded with grunts and them attempting to eat properly but failing to do so. I could then feel Blaise's attention turn to me as Pansy pulled the toast I had placed on my plate off to eat for herself. "So Draco, excited about the Hogsmead trip?"

I looked up at Blaise giving him my best-irritated look as I looked back down at my plate to cut my sausages. "No Blaise I am not."

That then brought Pansy's attention back to me as she stopped covering my toast with marmalade. "But Drake, why aren't you excited? You get to spend the whole day with me!"

I rolled my eyes, as if THAT sounded good. That comment then made me ecstatic that I was forced to stay here. I could kiss McGonagall for keeping me from a horrid day with Pansy. "Actually, I have detention with McGonagall so I won't be able to go."

Pansy let out a gasp and then the most annoying groan of disappointment. My thanks for having the detention were growing with each of her irritating habits. Blaise chuckled a bit at her reaction and shook his head, placing a piece of egg in his mouth.

"I didn't know you had a detention. What is it for?" Goyle asked with food in his mouth.

I curled my nose on instinct at the disgusting sight of his half masticated food falling out of his mouth as he spoke. I swallowed and cleared my throat to keep the bile from rising as I took a bite of my sausage. "McGonagall caught me jinxing a first year and told me to report to her today." I said after I had swallowed my food. I didn't want them to know I was beginning to get low marks in my class. Everyone expected me to get top marks and to find that I was close to failing would not be received well.

Pansy released a very unbecoming snort as she took another bite of my toast, the toast being the only thing she would be eating today apparently. "That stupid Bint. She is always over reacting. Jinxing a first year is not a good reason to keep you from a Hogsmead trip. No wonder you look so depressed today, I would be too if I had to spend all day with her."

Everyone seemed to stop paying attention to Pansy as we fell into silence. I grabbed another piece of toast and was in the middle of buttering it when something caught my eye. Across the room sitting in between her lap dogs was the girl who had infiltrated my dreams. She seemed flushed for some reason and was currently glaring at Pothead; that made me smile a bit. It always satisfied me to see that they weren't getting along. Maybe it was because I loved seeing them frazzled or maybe it was the sheer fact that anything that upset Potter brought me joy. Either way I was glad to see that the day was starting off on a good note.

But then the sight of her and Pansy's new attempt at talking about the trip brought my worry right back. She would be leaving with the rest soon and I had no idea if she would be messed up in everything. I wished I could have convinced her to stay that way I would have had some piece of mind but I was not so fortunate. As breakfast came to a close people began to walk outside to get in line for the trip.

"Drake, will you walk me to the line?" Pansy asked me as she clung to my arm and tried to look cute, tried being the operative word.

I sighed, knowing there was no way of denying her when she had he claws wrapped around my arm, and proceeded to walk her outside with the rest. It was colder than I had expected it to be, and me being only in my cloak and a sweater was not prepared to deal with it. "I'm going back in. I have to report to McGonagall anyway." I told her, trying to get away from her and inside to the semi-warmth as fast as possible.

Pansy was pulling her scarf around her mouth when I pulled away. She mumbled something I couldn't understand and tried to grab my arm again but I pulled away and just started walking. As I walked back toward the entrance I spotted the trio coming out of the doors. Hermione was dressing in her muggle clothing she seemed to love and a cloak. She had her Gryffindor scarf and hat on and though I detested the colors she looked rather lovely in them, especially with her cheeks and nose red from the cold.

I smirked and walked toward them, needing to release some of the stress I was feeling. I spotted Weasel wearing his ratting clock and decided that it was his turn to get it. "My Weasel, don't you look smashing in that hand me down cloak. Tell me is it warm enough under it or are all the moth holes letting the air in?"

I could feel Hermione staring at me, unsure of how she should react. Since our meetings I had refrained from antagonizing them, as often as I used to, but today I needed the little bit of normalcy I had left in my life, and what was more normal than me annoying Potter and his sidekick?

"Sod off Ferret, or I'll bounce you around just like Moody did." He seemed pleased with himself for thinking of such a witty remark. Though that experience still affected me I did not flinch or show any reaction, not wanting them to know it was still a sour subject.

"Cute Weasel, but your witty remarks wont make up for you lack of a proper cloak. Why are you even going to Hogsmead today? I doubt you will be able to buy anything."

Hermione was starting to glare at me, she obviously did not like me attacking her friends but I ignored it. She was one of the stressors that were attacking my nerves, and if she would not stay to ease it then I would happily use this. Potter stepped toward me and looked me in the eye.

"Get out of our way Malfoy, I'm not in the mood for you today."

I turned and gave my signature smirk to the scared loser and stepped aside to pass them. "Fine, I only had time for a quick batch of insults anyway. I'll be leaving you to your date Potter." I looked at Wesley and raised an eyebrow. "You wouldn't want to keep your boyfriend waiting." I then walked past them and right next to Hermione.

The two dunderheads walked away, complaining about how I always had to ruin their day, when I looked at her. She looked anything but pleased to see me but did not walk with them. "Why do you always have to attack them?" she whispered, trying not to bring attention to the fact that we were actually speaking.

I shrugged and smiled at her. "It's what I do." I started to walk past her but as I did I stopped and grabbed her hand, squeezing it. I leaned toward her, making it look like I had one last insult to give her and whispered. "Remember to be safe today."

She turned to look at me and I could see the question in her eyes but I let go of her hand and walked back into Hogwarts.

McGonagall found me seconds after I walked in the door and scolded me for not reporting right to her office after breakfast. She brought me to her classroom and told me I had to complete all the homework I had not done plus a two foot essay on why completing homework was important to my academic life and what I would do to make sure everything was completed on time. I wanted to Avada myself on the spot.

A half-hour in she stopped paying close attention to what I was doing and began grading papers. I looked up at her making sure she wasn't looking and pulled out the coin. I rubbed it between my cold fingers before sending the message to Rosamerta to hand out the package soon. When the words on the coin melted away and I knew the message was sent, I tried to focus on the daunting task at hand.

After what seemed like centuries and five homework assignments later, a large commotion could be heard in the hall. This being the most exciting thing that had happened to me all day, I turned toward the door and tried to see what could be making the noise. A second later that stupid oaf of a grounds keeper came running in and up to McGonagall.

He tried to whisper but with his inability to catch his breath he had to speak up for her to hear him.

"Professor, Katie Bell 'as bin cursed," he stopped to catch a bit more of his breath, "Took 'er to Pomfrey. Harry and 'em saw the 'ole thing, they're comin' in righ' now."

McGonagall turned to me and I tried to keep myself together. So, she gave it to Katie Bell 'eh? She must have opened the package for the necklace's curse to affect her. I couldn't help but feel relief with the fact that he hadn't run in here screaming Hermione had been the one cursed. I didn't even know I had held my breath until he said who had been cursed.

"Mr. Malfoy, I need you to go to your common room immediately. I expect all the work you did not complete on my desk by Monday." With that she ushered Hagrid out of the room telling him to go alert Dumbledore.

I slumped down in my chair and just sat there, thinking about what had just happened. It didn't get to Dumbledore. I didn't really expect it to but I thought it would get a little bit closer. Now that other teachers are involved they will be extra wary of the item. I sighed, grateful that Snape had been helping me with everything and would make sure this did not get back to me.

Though it would get back to my father and the Dark Lord that I had failed at this attempt. I rubbed my face, dreading what that would mean for me. I could remember the last time the Dark Lord was not pleased with me. I shivered as my body began to ache from the memory. The hours and hours I spent under the cruciatus had left me unconscious for a week. I was surprised I hadn't ended up like Longbottom's parents. I knew that it would probably be the same this time around, if not worse.

I gathered everything, trying not to think of how brutal the next meeting with the Dark Lord would be. The halls were empty, probably from people still being at Hogsmead or in their common room. I decided that I wasn't ready to go back to the common room just yet. Merlin knows the last thing I need right now is Pansy hanging all over me regaling me with everything she did that day.

I walked the halls, not really having a destination in mind. I went wherever my feet took me, lost in the possibilities of what could happen to me when the Dark Lord heard of my horrible failure. I knew it was a horrible attempt but I just didn't know what to do. How was I supposed to get near a man who seemed to know everything, let alone kill him?

I wasn't aware that someone else was in the hall with me until they pulled me toward an empty classroom. I jumped in my skin at the contact and looked down to see Hermione. She seemed desperate to get out of the hall and in somewhere private so I nodded and we walked into the classroom. I was a bit surprised when I noticed it was the History classroom.

I had just gotten my wits back when she began to speak. "Katie Bell was cursed today in Hogsmead, is that what you meant when you said I had to be careful?" I looked at her and must have looked dazed for she huffed and repeated herself.

I didn't think of what would happen after my attempt. I never thought that part through let alone what to say when questioned about it. I should have realized when I warned Hermione that she would seek me out and demand the answers I had not given her previously. I could lie, I should lie, but what would I say that she would actually believe. My brain was too pre-occupied to think of a solid lie so I said the only thing I could say.

"I'm glad it wasn't you."

That didn't see to please her in the least. Her cheeks started to darken as her eyes narrowed a bit. "So you knew this was going to happen?"

I nodded, "yes, just not to who it would happen to."

She stood there; obviously not prepared for the answer I had given her. Her jaw was a bit slacked until I could see her brain begin to work in overtime as she thought. She drew her bottom lip into her mouth and gnawed on it, thinking.

I just watched her, too overwhelmed and exhausted to think or act. This had changed everything, and I had done it in a calm and cool voice. I could feel my dream coming true, her leaving me saying she hated me. I was prepared for violence, I was not prepared for what I got.

"Are you behind this?"

She looked nervous; I would even go as far as to say she looked scared. If I told her I was behind the attack would she fear me? Would she turn me into her beloved Potter and Weasel? I again was unable to think of what should be sad yet I knew I couldn't, I wouldn't tell her the truth.

"No, I'm not."

She sank once again into her thoughts as her lip suffered for it. She looked up at me again and I could tell she was trying think of all sides to this. She stared at me, trying to see through everything and figure out if I was lying or telling the truth, if she should trust me or run like hell.

"Do you know who was behind this?"

I nodded.

"Is it a Death Eater?"

I nodded again.

"Will there be more attacks?"

This time I hesitated. I had to be careful when I answered this. Now that I had mentioned the Death Eaters she would be more prone to bring this to her lackeys. She was protective, I knew this from all the times she had stepped forward to protect the other two thirds of her trio. If there were going to be more attacks she would want to warn them and keep them safe just as I had done for her.

I shrugged and shook my head. "I don't know. It's possible."

Then came the question I was dreading. "How did you know this would happen?"

I sat down in a chair and put my face in my hands. "Don't ask me that Hermione."

I could hear her walk over to me and then her hand was on my shoulder shoving it back so I would look at her. "I need to know Malfoy. This is important. She could have been killed!"

Malfoy. She didn't trust me anymore. Though I didn't know why I was so shocked by that. I guess I wasn't really shocked actually. I didn't know how I felt. Hurt? I sighed again and closed my eyes, trying to think of what to do. I should have just lied from the beginning. My father was right; lying is always the best thing to do when you are in a pinch.

"Look, I just knew ok. I can't tell you anymore than that."

She was obviously flustered and completely confused. She would go from looking annoyed to worried to hurt to confused to anger then back to annoyed again. Her brain must be working as if she were solving complex ancient runes. She looked at me and clearly had no idea what to say so she pulled the chair across from me and sat down as well. She looked down at her hands, which she had begun to wring.

"If I ask more questions will you answer them?"

I looked down at my own hands that I hand folded together. "Probably not."

I heard her sigh. She was taking this in a way I could never have expected. This was so calm. I truly had expected her to drag me away to Dumbledore's office and force me to confess everything I knew.

"And you really had nothing to do with this?"

I nodded, not bothering to look up. She probably didn't believe me: I wouldn't have believed me. I really hadn't thought this through. I was so stupid. The necklace was a weak attempt and then warning Hermione about it. That was the biggest mistake yet. Now she would be suspicious of me, always watching me like Blaise and Pansy. Her boyfriends would probably hex me or turn me in: she would probably never…

I jumped when I felt her move into my lap and her face on my hands. I looked up at her and my eyes must have looked like dinner plates because she smiled at me. "I believe you."

I couldn't have been more shocked unless you told me Professor McGonagall was a stripper. I couldn't wrap my head around it. I had all but told her I was a Death Eater. She knew I at least had connections to them from my answers and here she was in my lap smiling at me. Was she mental?

"Why?" I probably shouldn't have asked that, but it slipped out of my mouth before my brain could think better of it.

She tilted her head a bit so she could look me in the eye better. "Because I trust you."

I couldn't believe this was happening. I was having another dream; this had to be another dream because real Hermione would never say in a million decades that she would ever trust me, Draco Malfoy.

"You trust me?"

She nodded.

"Why?"

She looked pensive for a minute before adjusting herself on my lap. She looked me straight in the eye and leaned forward stopping just before our foreheads touched. "Because these past few weeks, I have seen a whole different you. The you I think you hide from the world. You've become a sort of…" she cut off and looked to the side as if she was uncomfortable going on.

"What have I become?" I wanted to know so badly what she was going to say.

She still didn't look at me but rather took a larger chuck of lip into her mouth. "I don't really know how to say it."

"Try." I whispered as she turned her whole head to look away.

She was starting to blush as she thought over her words. "You've become my lover, I guess you could say, and because of it I trust you." She turned to look at me; wanting to gauge my reaction to the title she had given us.

Lovers. I guess it was proper for what we were. We were not truly boyfriend or girlfriend, for I don't believe friend fits us well, but we were intimate with each other and I did care for her in a way.

A smile slowly spread across my face and soon was mirrored on hers. She leaned her forehead against mine and I tilted my head to catch her lips. I forgot everything I was so consumed with before, and just enjoyed the feel of her lips on mine.

My lover's lips.

Author Note: I HOPE YOU LIKED IT!! And you all assumed the meeting between father and son would be Lucius and Draco, PFFT!! You know what happens when you assume. Lol. But yes, I hope you liked this deliciously long chapter and PLEASE review. I know I have been a horrible author but I do try to please you so please review and give me a reason to continue. I love you all and I ADORE Ted for beta-ing my longest chapter to date. Till next time,

-Amy

PS. Watch out for my beta Ted's new original story over at within the next few days! His author name is BeardedMan550!!


	9. Chapter 9

Hey Everyone,

I really, REALLY hate when authors do this but I am in desperate need of help. I am having SEVERE writer's block and just can't think of where to take the story next. If you have any ideas PLEASE e-mail me ideas of where YOU think it should go. If your idea gets my brain working you will be credited and sent the chapter before it is posted to read!!

So please, I beg you, if you want an update soon I need help.

PLEASE

Love,

Loveangelli

P.S. This author note will be replaced with chapter nine when it is written. It is in your best interest to e-mail or message me rather than post review because you wont be able to review new chapter.

P.P.S. My E-mail is and can also be found on my profile.


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